Michael Castro
Chapter#11
ELEVEN
HAT BOX
July 14, 2008
After writing “Three Speed Rider” I had this very peculiar dream that seemed so real. Maybe after sharing it with you, Big Brother, you can tell me if you’ve ever had such a dream. When I’m done telling you about it, I’ll tell you about the significant message I got from it. Remember, it was a dream, so somethings might sound weird. But this is just more of the something you’ve grown-up with having a Little Brother like me.
In this dream I’ve moved back to the City from the Country, just like our entire family did in real-life. From what I can remember, I’m sitting in my Beige 1985 Chevy Silverado Truck, you know, just like the one you helped me restore back in the day Big Brother, but I’m having trouble getting it started. I’m in a rush to go somewhere very important, and my truck not starting couldn’t have come at a worse time.
After numerous attempts of turning the key, hearing it crank over but not start, I get out very upset. I’m cursing as I walk around to the front of my truck, and continue as I open the hood. After scanning underneath for a few seconds I suddenly see that one of the battery cables is semi-cut through as if someone had used a hack saw to try and steal the battery. So here I am left one cable cut, and one still attached to the battery, and my temperature is quickly rising.
Like so many times as we’ve done back in the past, I call our Junkyard Dog Friend Todd. I’m waiting for Todd to show-up, but we know he’s not the most punctual mechanic in the world, but his rates are cheap and he drinks cheap beer. Soon I feel as if I’ve waited the entire morning, getting nowhere, and I’m very frustrated.
Here’s where the dream gets kind of weird. While I’m waiting for Todd I fumble around the back seat and find this NEW BATTERY CABLE still in its packaging. In this dream I don’t know how to replace the damaged one, and don’t have any tools to even try. I’m disabled in this dream with back problems, just as I am in real life. I still decide to take this “Must Trip On Foot” back to the County and to try and find you. You know this trip from the City to the Country it’s that far if you’re traveling by car, but remember, my truck is broke down and I have this urgency inside me that keeps building.
After hours of continuous walking I finally arrive at the corner of Cedar/American Avenues. You know in real life that when a person reaches this point in the Country towards that Western Home you had built on the acre our parents Deeded you back in the day, my trip is about 95% completed. Makes sense doesn’t it?
While I’d previously been traveling south down Cedar Avenue I now have to decide whether to make a right turn on American Avenue and travel west, or continue all the way down Cedar to Adams Avenue. I make the decision to make a right on American, then plan turning left on either East or Orange Avenues because this will lead me straight to our Family’s Grape Ranch, and your house right next door.
As I’m now quickly walking west down American Avenue I’m suddenly fearful for no apparent reason, but the hair on the back of my neck is standing-up. I reach down, but instead of picking-up a stick for protection, I’m suddenly holding this large, beige “Hat Box” in my hands. It’s just like the one you use to keep your Western Hats in.
With this sudden fear inside me I begin running down American Avenue until I finally reach East Avenue, but I past it, and continued running towards Orange Avenue. When I got to Orange I’m amazed to see that the street is now blocked-off by all of these grape vineyards we both know aren’t there in real life. But it all seems so real. So I stop and look around where a street should be, only to now see these endless rows of perfectly tied vines.
After the weird setback of these vines, I continue running west on American until finally arriving to Cherry Avenue. When I turn left on Cherry I start running even faster because I feel something’s about to happen. We both know in real life when traveling down Cherry Avenue by car we always saw so many unchained dogs come out of nowhere and would actually start chasing your car for miles. All the while this anticipations inside me keeps growing.
As I’m running down Cherry Avenue, right before my very eyes multiple, young grape vineyards without grape stakes or grape wire are popping-up right next to me. I now find myself running in this same Sinking Country Soil our ranch had back in the day, and the paved road has now been totally replaced. All the while as I’ve been running I continue holding your Hat Box at the highest point possible to protect it, and make sure it gets to you in one piece.
With these young vineyards popping-up at my feet with every stride that I run, I begin to hear this faint growling at first as I turn to see where it’s coming from. These large Pit Bulls and Doberman Pinchers suddenly come out of nowhere, and start running after me! I then shift my running speed into “Third Gear” while realizing all of these growling dogs aren’t interested in my body parts, but desire getting at your Hat Box instead! These dogs start to jump at your Hat Box one by one like Lambs Trying to Jump over the Moon! I’ve now shifted my running into this gear I never knew I had before, while lifting your Hat Box higher and higher to make each dog miss their target.
When I’ve just about reached Adams Avenue still holding your Hat Box high in the sky, those dogs started running ahead of me block-off Adams Avenue to the left. They suddenly started sitting evenly spaced-out like some Cal Trans Orange Cones with Big Teeth only allowing a right turn. While passing them Sitting at Attention, I notice how they’re growling teeth were now being replaced by these Big Grins. I didn’t even stop to ask why as I quickly made a right turn towards Elm Avenue.
The dogs broke from Formation and start chasing once again. They started jumping at your Hat Box once again, but instead of being angry, they were now amused they had escorted me on this important trip. When I reached Elm Avenue, or Freeway 41 as we both know, there was lots of fast moving traffic traveling in both north and south directions. Without stopping for some reason I managed to cross without getting hit by a car or Eighteen Wheeler.
Once across, I turned to see if any dogs had followed me. It was interesting to see how they’d all stopped on the side of Freeway 41, and are all sitting there side by side once again, grinning at me as continued running into The Big Potato Market. As I enter with your Hat Box still high over my head, I found you there, still working in your old job out of high school even though that was some 30 years ago. You were talking to Chuck Jr. behind the Meat Counter, both wearing your “Sky Blue Aprons.”
As I ran-up to both of you, and lay-down your “Hat Box” high on top of the Meat Department Counter Case I’m all out of breath from running. When I’m just about to tell you what I’ve been through that morning, and start to open your Hat Box to hand to you what’s inside…I wake-up, and I can’t go back to sleep to finish this dream! After countless tries I decide to get out of bed about 3:00am on Sunday Morning, and I quickly start writing down this dream before forgetting. I know deep in my heart it has a very important significance so let me explain what it meant: This dream starts-out in the Present Time because I’m now living in the City, but when I walked out of my house to find that old Beige Chevy Truck sitting in my driveway, that part is from our Past because you know we got rid of that truck a long time ago.
When I phone and wait for our friend Todd, who wasn’t the most punctual person in the world back then and also in my dream this is also from the Past because we haven’t seen him in many years. As I start traveling on foot back in time to your Country House I’m no longer thinking about myself, or worried about Todd fixing my truck because I’m concentrating fully on finding you in order to deliver you Hat Box. Making this Special Delivery was always first and foremost from the beginning of my dream.
I feel the part of those mean dogs chasing me in the Right Direction represented my conscience to do the right thing while facing the many challenges we both began to face in our teens and young adulthood while living in the Country. We can now only try keeping a positive attitude by taking one day at a time because we just can’t change the Past Decisions we’ve made. Knowing that Future Challenges can make us stronger people is the type of challenge I now welcome. Throughout this dream I have this “Gut Feeling” that whatever’s in this “Your Hat Box” is of great importance to you, Big Brother. That’s why I’m constantly changing my traveling directions when unexpected things arise, just like they do in Real Life. Constantly protecting “Your Hat Box” from those leaping dogs while trying my hardest to deliver it to you in one piece as soon as I possible is how we are “Pushed to Our Limits While Trying to Keep Our Sanity.”
In the end although I don’t get a chance to actually open “Your Hat Box” before awakening I still know exactly what was inside. First realize the size wasn’t that of a simple “Shoe Box,” or else it could have been holding a pair of your “Prideful Lizard, Snake, or Ostrich Tony Lama Cowboy Boots” you wore back in the day. During this dream, I felt the contents were much more valuable than any Materialistic Thing you and I could even own Big Brother.
I say this because in this particular “Hat Box,” I knew were “The Holly Offerings of Forgiveness from God.” This “Box of Forgiveness” had been personally sent to you from God Almighty because of all the things you’ve shared with Him in the Past, and with me in your most recent letters. You shared “Many Feelings of Regret” for the things you’ve done, or wished you have done in the Past, You regret how your marriage didn’t work out with Martha as you really would have preferred. You also shared how much you “Regret” not being there as much for your daughter Misti. Let me remind you, “Both of Your Girls love you very much, and always will.”
So when you read this message, just know that I’ve realized that those dogs chasing me weren’t trying to hurt me at all. I understand they were merely trying to Guide me Towards the Right Direction and Down the Right Path order for me to find you. I’m “franticly running” in this dream because I know this “Box of Forgiveness” is being sent by All Mighty God who wants it delivered to you “As Quickly as Possible.” He knows we all make mistakes in our lives, and the mistakes of yours and mine are now “Forgivable, and Things of the Past.”
He also wants you to know that right after we repent, and ask for forgiveness We’re Forgiven! After God forgives us remember He then “Wipes Our Slates Clean,” and doesn’t keep adding-on more bad checks marks beside our names! The Message I’m trying to share and also received from this dream is “If God can forgive us for what we’ve done then we should forgive ourselves.” Past regrets have weighing us both down for too long already. It’s time to start using our “God Given Talents and Energy” towards working on improving our attitudes, and our lives for the future. When we keep God in our hearts and minds we’re never alone no matter what we’ve done in the Past. He is there to Strengthen You when you need someone to lean-on.
Just remember, Big Brother. You can always write me about anything troubling you. I only ask that you let me know if you still remember some of the things I’ve already written you about. We’re never alone at any “Given Point” we spend here on Earth even though we can’t physically see anyone else around. Also, remember to keep writing “Your Little Brother” because I was “God’s Little Messenger” in my dream.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us form all unrighteousness.”