Chase looked at me, and placed his hands on my hips.

"I’ve been looking for you. I wanted to text you, but I thought I should actually face for this."

I looked at him, and crossed my arms, and flipped my hair from my eyes. I really did not want to talk to him. "Can we talk later. Let’s talk at lunch, okay? "

He looked sad when I said that, but he nodded. "Okay, meet me at the picnic tables outside by the library. "

"Okay, I will be there. " I said and walked up the rest of the stairs passing him, and not even giving him a smile.

I could not get that kiss out of my head, and it made me still feel queasy.

My stomach was knots, and we were dissecting fetal pigs today in biology. Great. I’m not going to eat today because of all that I had been through. I will have to power through it.

I was paired up with some jocks, who were more interested in cutting it up than labelling the parts. So I had to label as fast as I could, while they were busy cutting up the pig. I was really frustrated that my teacher, Mrs Bowman, put me with the jocks. I hate assigned groups.

Mrs. Bowman had red hair, and looked like a snowman with her button down shirt tucked into her high waisted pants. I was soft spoken next to them because if I said something to make them  do work, they might beat me up or something. So I just wrote down everything I saw as they were cutting the pig up. I tried to only sign my name to the paper, we had to turn in at the end, but they called me out, and signed it. I part of me wanted them to fail. I mean why should they credit.

They’ll get scholarships for football, and I will have to work hard, and hope that I can get an academic scholarship because I am not athletic at all. I mean, I dance in my room, but I am by no means good. Besides, I do not want people to see me dance. I would die of embarrassment, and get to anxious, and forget all the steps. I always dance in my room like I am in front a big audience, but I don’t think  I would have what it takes to actually do it.

 I did all the work anyway, but whatever. I turned it in after they signed, and gave the teacher a nasty look, and left the class room with a flair. I hated that teacher with a passion. She would pick on the boys, and lecture us, like we were some kind of evil creature from the depths of hell. I think She thought girls were heaven sent, and was probably mad that she was not a lesbian, and had to settle for man, who probably cheated on her. I think I remember Sam saying she has had five husbands. They probably all cheated on her or something. I feel bad for her about that, but that is no excuse to label all the people with a something between their legs as evil.

I walked to my locker, and grabbed my lunch. It was a simple lunch of a starfruit, a bottle of water, and a yogurt today.

"Hey, Jeong, want to have lunch with us today?" Edward said as I round a corner.

"I can’t today. I’m going to eat outside today. It’s too pretty to be cooped up inside today. " I smiled. "But thanks anyway. "

"I understand that. " Edward said, running his fingers through his quiff hairstyle. Danielle was with him, and was clinging onto him, and she smiled, and said. “We miss you at the table, you should hang out with us."

I smiled, and was polite because Edward was there. " I’m good, really today. I will definitely be sitting with you guys tomorrow. " I left, and went to the library, and went out the door of the library since it was quicker to do that than round the front office, and risk being caught by Sam or Zach.

I walked out, and did not see Chase anywhere. I sighed, and walked to the picnic table, and sat down underneath some large trees that brought shade. They allowed the sun to peek through with design of their leaves. It was tranquil little spot. I could meditate on top of the table, and listen to the birds chirping all day, if I did not have to attend school. I opened my yogurt, and started eating. I enjoyed the silence, and was kind of relieved that Chase was not here yet. I was little frustrated that I did not bring my book to read, while I enjoyed the silence in the sun.

Then I heard him.

"Hey Jeong! " Hey yelled out.

I sighed, and turned around. There went the silence. I turned around a gave a smile, and waved.

"Hey Chase!" I yelled back. He ran over, and sat on the table on the same side I was sitting. I straddled the seat, that he placed his feet on.

"So. About the other day, when I kissed you." He looked at me, and bit his lip. I could tell he was nervous.

"What about it? " I said, and bit into my starfruit.

"I’m sorry. " He said, and looked at me, and grabbed his left arm with his right hand. "I had smoke some weed with my friend in the car that morning. "

"It’s okay. I was scared, but I’m pretty much over it. " I took another bite. "You should have just told me if you liked me though. " I said, and looked at him with a friendly smile. I cannot believe that smoked weed, but I’m pretty sure everyone has tried weed once. I had it when I went to this party in middle school. I don’t know why it is illegal. It does not really make you feel anything other than just hungry.

"Oh... well. I guess I should have. But I just came out as transgender a few weeks ago, and my parents are taking me to therapy. They think it is a mental illness because... " He trailed off, and I could tell that he wanted to cry.

"that’s awful. Well I’ll be here for you. " I smiled, and placed my hand on his knee. "But I don’t like you like that.  I love you and respect you, but as friends. Okay?"

He nodded. "Thanks, Jeong. You’re a good friend. "

There it was. A good friend. He called me that, but I was not sure I was, or I will ever be. I’m confused as to what that actually means? Does it even have a definition? All I can do is smile.

"So, what have you been up to?" I said trying to change the subject.

"I’ve been working out in the basement with my brother’s old weights. " he said flexing. "I hope I can see a big difference in a month or two. "

"You definitely have some muscle tone. Have you been eating protein? " I said and finished my lunch, and took a sip of water.

"A little bit. I want to get some protein powder."

I nodded. "That would be good if you want to bulk up. How much are you lifting? "

Next Chapter: Chapter 20