Zoe sat as instructed by Gwyneth at the large kitchen table plastering strawberry jam on her fourth scone, then piling on cream. In one bite, half of the creation managed to get inside leaving a messy ring around her mouth and sundry dollops on her chest, at the exact time the door opened. “Nice?” said Michael. The shock led to the rest of the scone falling into her lap. He picked up a towel and handed it to her. She chewed quickly while cleaning up. “Is that lunch Zoe?”

“Is now, I pigged out. You’re back early.”

“Or late considering I was meant to be here last night. I’m sorry I can’t always keep promises right now, things are hectic. I had an appointment last night in Panama I couldn’t break.”

“Which you can’t tell me about.”

“I can but it’s personal and not very nice." He took a seat and broke a scone in two. “I suppose I should say I had to make sure a friend admitted himself to hospital. He had major depression and …” His voice trembled. It took several seconds for him to continue. “I got to him when he was about to swallow a pile of pills and he wasn’t going anywhere with me. So I paid a couple of local thugs to kidnap him, get him to a treatment centre. Broke the law and broke my heart in the process.”

“You did the right thing.”

“Useless. Last night he talked his way out and left via the roof. I just got word after we landed.” Tears welled up, he rose and took the towel, dabbing his eyes with it. Zoe stood up and took the towel. “May I remove the cream from your eyebrow?” He nodded and managed a smile. “Sorry about that.”

“Don’t be silly.”

“How about taking a walk with me? I’ll show you the garden.”

“I’d love to. Everything’s off the record unless you state otherwise Michael, so don’t worry about speaking out of school.” They walked outside without speaking. Zoe considered he was as uptight as anyone she had seen and put it down to the loss of his friend. She quickly discovered there was an additional element, which almost exploded out of him the second they stopped. “Would you like to come with me to Panama and attend the funeral and then maybe spend a couple of days in the Bahamas. I have a place there. It would mean a lot to me, but please regardless I will provide that full interview you’ve been patiently trying to get.” Zoe held her tongue while she processed the request. His phone rang, he mouthed sorry and answered it, then spent a minute listening to the caller. “Thank you, give me an hour.” He sighed and beckoned her to head back inside, “Sorry Zoe, I need to go into Havana. I’ll be back this evening.”

“Yes, I’d love to come with you. The funeral, Bahamas.” He looked stunned then smiled. “Good, wonderful. Talk tonight.” With that he was out the door leaving Zoe to contemplate the meaning of life and whether to stuff another scone down her throat. The latter was the tougher task and she resolved to defer a final decision until the jam and cream had been applied. She let her creation stand on the plate for several minutes before she started to pull the plate ever so slowly closer to her, stopping as Gwyneth entered carrying a bucket. “I’ve made you a scone Gwyneth.”

“Thank you dear, I shall have it with tea. I have just picked a dragon fruit, delicious for breakfast.” She sat at the table. “Now what is my silly grandson doing?”

“He’s had to go into Havana.”

“I know. He just told me. What about the funeral? Has he discussed that with you?”

“Yes, he told me what happened. It’s very sad.”

“They were school friends. Now at my age I do not have time to beat around the bush. I do get annoyed when I do. What has he offered you?” Zoe smiled. “A trip to a funeral and then the Bahamas.”

“Excellent. Please keep me abreast of developments, I do not like be a nosey parker.”

“Of course, you remind me of my friend Tanami, she hates having to ask. Excuse me while I call her, she’s anxious. Back in a tick.” She began to rise and sat back down when a little shriek came from Gwyneth. “Please stay Zoe. Call from here. It will save you having to put up with my inquisition. You do understand at my age any drama extends my perception of time in the sense it slows down time. You’ll understand that better as you age.”

“I’m sure Tanami would love to say hello.” They listened to the call, after four rings Tan’s voice was heard. “Tan’s busy.” Zoe closed the phone. “She never listens to her messages so no point in leaving one.”

“I like that.” said Gwyneth. “A waffle free woman.” Zoe laughed. “I wish. Ah, she’s calling back. Hi Tan, a wonderful decent Christian lady is listening in so keep it clean.”

“Hello, I’m Daniel. You are shown as Zit on her phone.”

“Close, I’m Zoe. You were going with her to the meeting. What’s happened?” Her face drained of colour. With no response after several seconds she asked again. “Sorry Zoe, just talking to the doctor. I’m at the hospital. She was attacked in the guy’s room. She is….. unconscious. They’re going to do something to her brain. Scans or something.”

“What exactly is wrong, how bad is it? Please make sense.”

“I don’t really know. They don’t tell you much. She was very sick, I-”

“Hello, Daniel cannot talk further. Stay still Daniel. Ring back please.” Zoe jumped up. “I need to go to Miami. How do I get a taxi?”

“You go pack dear. I’ll get Alan to help you. He was up all night so he won’t be happy, but then again he never is. On the surface at least.”

Half an hour later Zoe was seated next to Alan being driven sedately along the track. She wondered if he knew what the accelerator was for and how could she frame a request for him to speed up without him snapping back. Or worse, deliberately slowing down. He stopped at a T-Junction and turned to her. “If I go right you would find it far more interesting and the extra twenty minutes it will take will reduce the time we’ll be sitting in the car waiting for our flight. Your instructions please.”

“Why would we need to wait in the car?”

“It is air conditioned. The shed at the strip we will be using lacks same.”

“You decide.” Please." Zoe leaned back and closed her eyes, asking further questions would likely do nothing more than pain her. As it transpired she spent much of the following half hour firing questions at him and receiving detailed information on the history and geography of the area. Arriving at the airstrip was all too soon for her. “That was fascinating Alan. Many thanks.”

“No need to thank me, I was doing my duty. Our timing is good. The plane has landed and should be ready to go shortly.”

“That jet? I’m going in that?”

“That is Mr. Manhattan’s private jet. It has been diverted here especially for you so I do recommend you thank him for his kindness.” He got out and took her into the plane before disembarking. She stood looking at the cabin with its six seats on either side and turned in response to a tap on the shoulder to see a sombre Michael. “Hi. Take a seat please. We should have you at the hospital inside four hours. I’ve asked someone to find out where she’s at. I’ll be back once we’re in the air.” She buckled up and began processing the events of the day. As the jet left the strip and sharply rose she reached the conclusion she would die in the Bermuda Triangle and Tan as per usual would pull through. She wondered whether that would be an irony before wondering where exactly was the Bermuda Triangle. And what would get priority if it crashed? The death of Manhattan or the history of the graveyard. Undoubtedly she would at best get a mention as an insignificant passenger unless of course Tanami got into the act and wrote her up as Manhattan’s advisor and secret lover. Then again maybe she’d end up being described as the gangster’s moll. Michael returned and did his best to entertain her with business stuff ups of his that normally would have been both illuminating and funny. She did her best to throw in a laugh occasionally missing the target as Tan’s skull poked into her thoughts. Twenty minutes out of Miami she stopped him mid- sentence. “I’m so sorry, I’m rude. I haven’t thanked you for this.”

“I’m more than happy to help out.” Zoe looked out of the window wondering whether they were over the Bermuda Triangle. “Excuse me Zoe, I’m waiting.”

“Pardon?”

“It’s ok, I was just being silly. You mentioned you hadn’t thanked me.”

“Oh, thanking you. Yeah thank you. Thank you.” She put a hand on his shoulder and kissed his cheek. “Sorry Michael, I’m away with the fairies at the moment.” He put on a mock pained expression, she frowned then smiled. “I wasn’t labelling you. Hey I was just wondering if we’re over the Bermuda Triangle? I’ve been meaning to look up a map since I was a kid.”

“As it’s a mythical place, you might be battling to find it on a map. One vague definition places it in a triangle between Miami, Bermuda and Puerto Rico. Cuba is south of that. Still, as we will be landing in Miami I guess the last few miles at least could safely be claimed as part of the ill-defined triangle of the devil. Mind you, a hell of a lot of people have died below trying to get to Florida. But of course their deaths were never a mystery or part of any grand conspiracy theory. For many it was better dead than red. Hell, I’m talking like you’re a five year old. Pathetic. Sorry.”

“So you should be. You’re talking out of school. I know as much as a two year old about this area. Here’s another one for you. I thought I’d have trouble getting into Cuba with all the new restrictions.”

“All fluff and puffery. Nothing much has changed, Obama would let a journalist wanting to go to Cuba on their own travel under the People to People category. Now you have to use the Support for the Cuban People category. You must of course spend all your time talking to Cubans such as on business. There are certain businesses you can’t deal with, like a few hotels, gift shops and whatever you do don’t dare go near Cachito soda. I’m only guessing that POTUS must have had an accident with a bottle for that to go on the banned list.”

“Then I was visiting Cuba illegally.”

“No, I’ve been advised you spent most of your time interacting quite intensely with Cubans. Such as successfully negotiating the import of dragon fruit with a canny exporter and failing to get a deal with Alan Industries to import good manners.”

“Gwyneth is Cuban?”

“Off the record she now is. By the way I read that article of yours on Cuba, impressive. You do know a little of Cuba it seems.”

“Which article?”

“In praise of the Cuban health system. I thought you were a little below the belt in using a family in a GOP state. From memory the uninsured mother was facing crippling pain for the rest of her life. And you cleverly pointed out the benefits of the family migrating to Cuba.”

“Nothing really clever Michael, just facts. Yeah ok, I tugged at heartstrings, maybe stretched them a little, but I did listen to our home grown master of obfuscation. Hail Caesar.”

“You’ll never be that good. I must go and play my role in landing this beast and make sure we have transport ready.”

“Your bio doesn’t mention you can fly.”

“Sensible, once an aviator, now a rusty shell of one but I do satisfy the legalities and the sensibility of having two pilots on board. Belt up and fingers crossed.”

Zoe watched him enter the cockpit, kicking herself for not confirming what his plans were. Was he staying, leaving, did he still intend to take her to the funeral? She kicked herself again, there might well be another funeral that would take priority. The landing and delay in clearing customs was a blur to her, the focus was on Tan. Michael jumped the taxi queue and once on their way her call to Tan’s phone went to message, raising her anxiety. A minute later Daniel rang back advising he had no news and would meet them in the foyer. Zoe rushed through the entrance to see a man with his left arm in a sling rise from a seat, wave and walk towards her. “Daniel, I’m Zoe, where is she, how bad is she?”

“She seems ok, still waiting on the scans to see if there’s any bleeding on the brain. Something like that.”

“Hell. She’s ok? You’re sure?”

“Well she’s talking a lot.” Zoe bent over with her hands on her knees, taking in a few deep breaths before straightening up and putting a hand on Michael’s shoulder. “Thank you. She’s ok, she’s ok, thank God. Can we see her?”

“She’s got her doctor with her but she should be free soon.”

“What happened at the meeting?” said Zoe. Daniel pulled out his phone. “I filmed part of it, you can watch it but it’s awful. I mean really sickening, the guy was tortured.” Zoe held her hand out, he handed it over while Michael looked over her shoulder. Daniel watched the pair adopt shocked looks with Michael having to place a hand on Zoe’s wrist in an attempt to steady it. She handed the phone back and sat on a seat. “The poor man, you poor things.”

“The cops weren’t too happy with us. The crime scene was certainly badly contaminated. Funny, I’d never have thought I’d get sick. Anyway so when whoever tortured and killed the guy came out of the bathroom and rushed us with a knife I had started dry retching. Same with Tan.”

Michael held his hand out to Daniel. “I’m Michael.”

“Sorry guys, forgot,” said Zoe. As the men shook hands a male and female police officer approached them. The female put a hand on Daniel’s good arm and whispered, “We’re off.” Daniel responded with, “Thanks a lot.”

“Can we go now please?” said Zoe. “Let’s,” said Daniel. “The cops helped us and just wanted to check on Tan. And to tell her they had to keep her purse for a while. It got mixed up with the guy’s….stuff.”

They went up in silence and as Daniel led them past the nurse’s station a nurse stopped them. “Where are you going?”

“Tanami’s room,” said Daniel. “I’ve been sitting with her on and off for hours.”

“Well I’ve just come on young man. Let me check with her.” Tan’s loud voice was heard just before the nurse opened her door. “You bastard! You insult every foreign country in the world and now you’re insulting the United fucking States of America!”

“She’s not great at handling politics,” said Zoe. The nurse beckoned them to go in. Zoe took the lead and stood arms folded at the door facing the bed. “Please stop abusing my President. Turn it off, you have visitors.” Tan shrieked, Zoe rushed to her and the pair hugged while indulging in animal noises according to Daniel. “So you’re ok?” said Zoe. Tan grinned. “I think so, the doc has to confirm it but I squeezed out of the idiot who scanned me that I had half a brain. That’s a relief.”

“Whew. Well Jack can’t call you brainless anymore. Now meet Michael. Michael, Tanami.” Michael shook hands with her, she stared wide eyed at him. “Yuk Zoe, you told me he was the sexiest handsomest man alive.”

“At least she was right about you Tanami,” said Michael. “You are indeed a delightful beautiful woman.”

“Oh shucks,” said Tan, “but what about a loud mouthed know-all?” All three nodded in unionism. Tan laughed, then when straight to spilling tears. Zoe hugged her. “You’re just a little hyper, reacting to the trauma, isn’t that right kid?” Tan nodded, then muttered, “Yeah, crap.”

“I’m staying the night,” said Daniel. “The cops said she’s safe here but it won’t do any harm with me hanging around. I’m going to get eats. Back soon.”

“I need to go Zoe,” said Michael. “The new pilot is waiting. Nice to meet you Tanami, I’m certain you’ll be quite amazing when you do find the other half of your brain.”

“Thank you Michael,” said Tan. “I hope to see a lot of you, not just when you’re POTUS and when I am your PR chief but also when you are hooked up with a tart I know very well. See you.” Zoe walked Michael to the elevator, wondering whether she should pin him down on the funeral date. He got in first, saying he would let her know when he knew and she turned her attention as to how she should say goodbye. The elevator door opened, she put a hand on his shoulder and moved in for a kiss on the cheek, daringly moving at the last instance to a peck directly on the lips. He held her tightly, gave her a passionate kiss of three seconds duration before releasing her. “It’s critical I fly out tonight.” He got in the elevator and softly said, “It’s all fake news Zoe.” She wandered back to Tan in a daze and sat on her bed. “He’s gone Tan.”

“Really. Seems you’ve gone too. Right, full blow by blow description and please, don’t hold back. You know I like to hear the dirty bits, no holds barred. It will be therapeutic for this poor little bunny.” Zoe spent a few minutes providing an accurate account of her Cuban adventure with Tan failing to interrupt her. “So that’s it.” Tan slumped back on her pillow and stared at the ceiling. “You are so right Zoe. Though I’d add pathetically to your admission of being hopeless. Though I wonder if it’s possible to be pathetically hopeless. Why didn’t you just jump the prick?”

“Nice one Tan. Can we change the subject? What’s wrong with Daniel’s arm?”

“No idea, probably malingering, probably just a few major broken bones and cut arteries. The idiot jumped in front of me just as the guy was about to stick a knife into me. He could have easily died. I was bumped into the door and went down. I’m on the floor looking up at Daniel holding the guy’s wrist with the knife, it’s about three inches from his jugular. This goes on for ages, then Daniel must have broken the guy’s wrist because he screams out and drops the knife and he’s then karate chopped or something like that and he manages to head for the door with me in the way and Daniel reckons he trod on my head on the way out and I was out to it.”

“Your minder saved your life.”

“Hardly, he stopped me from being the hero, showing off my skills.” Zoe patted her hand. “I’m sure you would have saved the day, next time maybe he’ll let you have a turn.”

“I’ll let you in on a secret Zoe. Whenever I hear about a bank hold-up where no one gets killed I get annoyed hearing how people need trauma counselling. Get over it I reckon. Well when I saw the bloody mess I was shocked but when I saw the knife I honestly could not move, even though my adrenalin went through the roof. All the flight or fight reaction is total bullshit. Shit Zoe, if that idiot hadn’t moved in front of me I’d be dead. You’d better thank Jack for forcing me to have him with me. I couldn’t stand watching him smirk.”

“What’s he costing?”

“Costing? Oh shit, Bill said I had to negotiate with him. I completely forgot. Can you work it out with him, please? Say it’s my brain damage that made me forget. No, can’t use that, he’d already met me. Say I was dropped by the midwife. Offer him ten percent more than Macca’s pays their delivery guys.”

“Zoe! I’ll dong your brain again if you don’t shut up. Now where is he going to stay tonight?”

“In here, in that chair, he’ll be my guard dog. I’ll feel safer.”

“You don’t know him. It’s unsafe. He might not behave himself.” A wide eyed Tan gaped for a few seconds. “You reckon I might get lucky?” Zoe smiled. “Where am I going to stay?

“You could bunk in with me. Lesbros for the night.”

Zoe received a message and frowned on reading it. “I must have half a brain too. I didn’t even think about where my gear was since I took it on the plane. I just got a message from the Mandarin Oriental to say they have my bag and we are booked into the penthouse suite.”

“You’re kidding! That’s one of the most expensive joints in the country. You sure it’s we, me too?”

“Doesn’t mention you specifically, but it does say there is adequate room for Daniel.”

“Quick, you’ve got to get me out of here. Start thinking.”

“It’s best to stay, just in case.”

“Crap, they just keep you in to earn more. Look, I might have upset the quack that saw me. I might have questioned whether she faked her degree.”

“That was fairly mild for you.”

“I also may have queried whether her inability to shed half a ton from her arse reflected on her medical skills. Shit, now I think her arse was better than mine. Anyway, she’s probably knocked off work by now so go and find my new doc and use your persuasive skills to get me out of here. If I walk out they’ll inform my insurer and I won’t be covered if something goes wrong.” Zoe shook her head slowly. “I’m sitting on the bed of someone who switches between acting like she has brain damage and then has the insight to consider the implications of ignoring insurance requirements. I feel like Alice at the Mad Hatter’s party.”

“Well Alice was a total weirdo, totally delusional. You’re wrong of course re the fundamentals. Mad people can still worry about money.” Zoe walked to the door and gave Tan a small wave. “I’ll find a quack. Or shrink.” She returned five minutes later to find Tan snarling at the TV. “Turn it off, and get dressed, we’re leaving.” Tan shrieked and jumped off the bed, buckling at the knees and ending up flat on the floor. Zoe helped her up. “You shouldn’t be weak in the legs. That’s not normal.”

“Thank you Doctor Who knows everything, but I’m not weak below, it’s in the head. I simply misjudged. So how did you do it?”

“Told the truth. Said you had half a brain from birth and then told him about the penthouse. He said wow, no wonder you’d want to get out of here, on your honeymoon and all that.”

“Brilliant, where’s Daniel?  I’d better make sure he knows about our wedding.”

“I didn’t mention a man in the picture. One catch, the doc wants to check you out, he’ll be here soon. Please behave yourself and don’t try to be normal. Just be yourself and live up to my description of you.”

Tan passed with flying colours. They arrived under the protection of Daniel at the hotel a little before midnight and after a short altercation Tan was persuaded to remain in her bed and yell at the news. The persuasion extended to a threat to send her back to the hospital.