A horror movie director snaps and kidnaps his critics, forcing them to survive the plots to his movies.
Dax fans! You get two updates in one morning! Aren’t you special? This, however, is not about Dax or myself, but another awesome book from another awesome author that needs your most awesome attention. ...Was that enough "awesomes"? I sound like an early ’90s breakfast commercial...
SO CHECK OUT THIS TOTALLY RADICAL BOOK! (Part of your balanced reading diet)
At the time of this update, the project needs 73 more pre-orders to get FULL FUNDING on Inkshares. I am super jealous, but I think it’s worth your attention and I hope you’ll agree. Check it out:
A God in the Shed by J-F Dubeau is a Fantasy/Horror story set in the forgettably small village of St-Ferdinand, in the Eastern Townships of Quebec. The villagers have been hiding a terrible secret for generations, but when their mysterious captive escapes and gets inadvertently trapped in the McKenzy’s backyard shed, it’s up to Venus and her friends to figure out how to dispose of this terrible and malevolent burden; an Old God of hate and death.
You can find out more about this dark and beautiful book, read sample chapters, reviews and pre-order your copy of A God in the Shed by visiting: www.inkshares.com/books/a-god-in-the-shed
You can listen to the prologue as read by Ageless author Paul Inman here: youtu.be/XJw5oZhqtXo
Need more incentive?
•Each pre-order enters you into the ‘I want to kill a reader’ raffle. The winner will have his name and likeness used in the book as a minor character that gets killed off. The author will work with the winner to find the appropriate means of demise to satisfy both the winner and the story.
•Each physical copy of A God in the Shed will be signed and numbered as an exclusive first edition item.
•Free, exclusive A God in the Shed bookmarks will be included with the physical copies and mailed to eBook supporters.
•Orders of three or more copies guarantees your name to appear in the Patrons list printed at the end of the book.
•You get to enjoy the satisfaction and pride at having supported both art and literature.
A God in the Shed is the first part of a trilogy that pushes the line between beauty and horror by telling a story that changes how we look at magic and the world around us. You have a chance of being part of making this book a reality and supporting a new author on his journey.
However, time is running out! The campaign ends April 22nd. Don’t miss out and order today!
Dear Mr. Sugar Smack,
Firstly, thank you for your business again this tax season. As usual your financial situation presents some unique challenges for myself and the tax codes of our great country. Working with you certainly keeps me on my toes! Accounting, like pimpin’, ain’t easy but I assure you it is necessary.
I am writing to respond to the various inquires you texted last night:
1. I’m sorry to say you may not write off your condom purchases. While I agree it is a necessary piece of safety equipment for your employees, attempting to use it as a tax deduction would be tantamount to admitting that your employees have sex for money, which as we have discussed repeatedly, is illegal.
2. Regarding the medical expenses stemming from the Repetitive Strain Injuries to your “Pimp Hand” you may only write off the amount for the year that exceeds 7.5% of your adjusted gross income. This unfortunately will not apply as you did not exceed that amount.
3. As you know, to write off the $7500 rims for your work vehicle, you need to adequately demonstrate that A: they were a necessary purchase and B: that they significantly increased the value of your business. I think you have achieved this with your extensive spreadsheet on the subject. Thank you for your excellent documentation. Quick question before referencing the depreciation chart, are they spinners?
4. If your pimp chalice is officially recognized by the Vatican, you will be able to write of a percentage of its value next year after you gift it to Rooster. Just be sure to have it appraised by a reputable antiquities dealer and keep a copy of that written documentation.
I think that addresses all of your concerns. If you have any other questions don’t hesitate to contact me.
Respectfully,
Roland Crestfield, C.M.A., C.P.A.
Check out Landon’s novel Monkey Business and share it with your peoples. Coming May 24, 2016 from Quill.
Happy freaking tax day homies.
All right, Dax fans, LISTEN UP! This is Commander Dax Harrison himself speaking.
