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Chapter 3 - Word of Mouth

It never occurred to Janie that she could have waited out the night in another room. She stayed by Beth’s side and wished with all her might that she could give her sister a hug. What’s nice, about not needing to sleep as a ghost, is you can spend the night thinking of all the things you want to say and planning how to get them said.

In the morning, Beth woke in the clothes she’d worn the day before, but her blazer was missing. Not that she cared. She took the empty bottle off the nightstand and into the kitchen where she poured some orange juice into the few last drops and then downed it all at once.

Some deodorant, some ibuprofen, and a bottle of water and she was out the door without bothering to do anything about her bed-head ponytail. However much she wanted to stay home and drink herself into oblivion, she couldn’t skip out on her job.

The Sally Forth Institute made its home in old factories that had a rushed renovation job to provide accommodations for and a chance at answers regarding the Great Revving. Beth’s workplace used to be some sort of textile manufacturer and was much more industrial overall compared to other such facilities, though each individual revving room was hermetically sealed. Standard of all facilities.

As Beth & Janie approached the building, someone in a brown corduroy jacket with leather elbow patches jogged past them in order to hold the door open for them.

"Good morning," David chimed, "looking as lovely in yesterday’s clothes as you did yesterday, I see."

"Go bite yourself," Beth snapped back, "it might be your last shot at a drink."

Janie and David followed Beth through the door and Janie signaled him to keep following. The trio headed straight back to the labs. Beth knew if anyone could prove or disprove David’s ability to communicate with Janie it would be Liam.

"Back off, man," Janie warned David, "I’m a scientist."

David nodded and dropped back a respectful step, and Janie glared at him for taking advantage of the better view he had of her sister’s gait. Once in the lab though, David stopped dead. Janie waved her hand in front of his eyes to get his attention.

"David," he just about shouted.

Beth and Liam turned and gave him a look.

"Yes," said Beth, "you’re David. I’m Beth. This is Liam. He’s gonna tell me you’re not a liar, or I’m gonna kill you."

"Can’t we start with a ’Good morning’ around here?" Liam asked.

"No," Beth said, "the Sucker here says he can see Janie and that she’s quoting Ghostbusters. Is there any way to verify that?"

"Well," Liam began, "a big part of vampires coming forward in an attempt to live out in the open was that they could in fact communicate with the recently deceased."

"Yeah," Beth cut in, "it was a big part of their rights fight, telling people they were speaking on behalf of their victims to prove it. But how do we know it’s true?"

"You quiz us," David offered.

"Excuse you?"

"You ask Janie questions and I tell you the answers. Granted this’ll be trickier, what with the movie quoting and all."

"Generally," Janie and Beth quoted in unison, "you don’t see that sort of behavior in a major appliance."

"Right, sort of," David said, smiling a little to himself at Janie’s excitement with how she and her sister had picked the same quote, "usually someone has to be under the influence of a Hemo sapien - if you will - at the time of their death for their postmortem behavior to be so … restricted. She’s also stuck staying within a certain proximity to you."

"You’re talking about Janie being suckered, right?" Beth asked.

"Yes," David said though he hated that particular term.

"But you’ve seen it before, I presume," Liam said, "how did you work around it?"

"Basically," David explained, "you ask a question, they answer to the best of their ability and you decide if the answer seems right to you based on what you know about them. You can ask as many questions as you like, or even do the ol’ how-many-fingers-behind-my-back test."

"Fingers behind the back!" Beth cried, false enthusiasm strong in her voice. "Why didn’t you say that before? That’s the first thing we should be doing. In fact, that’s the only thing we’ll be doing until I decide otherwise."

"Beth," Liam pleaded.

"No, Liam, it’s the most straightforward and logical course of action. You and me stand side-by-side with Janie’s ghost behind and off to the side. Right? So you can see her signal the answer to you? She will be signaling you, won’t she? You did, after all, say that she can only speak in movie quotes. So she must need to tell you visually how many fingers we’ll be holding up."

"Good call," David said, just trying to make the best of her mock excitement since it made her say helpful things, "right, yes, let’s do this."

Beth forced Liam into position on her right and David took a few extra steps back. At first it went as expected. They started with one hand each with Janie using her right hand to signal Liam’s number and her left to signal Beth’s.

"Liam, three; Beth, four … Liam, four; Beth, five; … Liam, five; Beth, three … Liam, one; Beth, five … Liam, two; Beth, five … Liam, five; Beth, two … Liam, three; Beth, five."

Then Beth started getting nervous and was using both her hands and Janie would have to wait a second after signaling Liam’s number to make sure David knew she was using both hands to signal Beth’s.

"Liam, one; Beth, three … Liam, four; Beth, ten … Liam, three; Beth, four … Liam, three; Beth, five … Liam that’s three threes in a row now; Beth, one on your left and four on your right." "Use both of your hands, Liam," Beth ordered.

"I think," offered Liam, "he’s proven Janie is present and communicating."

"Just one more," Beth insisted as she threw both hands behind her back. Janie’s jaw dropped.

"What?" David asked.

Janie signaled David.

"Classy," David told Beth, "though you’d probably be a little prouder of yourself if you slipped that one in the middle of the rapid fire."

"Beth," Liam groaned as he took a quick peak behind her back.

"Alright," Beth started in on David, "you can see Janie? You can communicate with her? There’s a line from the second Ghostbusters that we used to run around yelling at our dad all the time. What was it?" Janie ran over to David and opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She tried again and again. She tried to say something else, anything else from the second movie.

"There is no Dana, only Zuul" she said to herself, realizing the awful truth.

"What’s the matter, David? No cute little parlor trick to pull the right quote out of your ass?"

"There is no Dana," Janie cried to David, holding up two fingers close to his face, "only Zuul," she finished, holding up one finger for him to see. David’s face fell as he realized what Janie was saying.

"There is no Dana, only Zuul," David said.

"That’s from the first movie," Beth said.

"No," David restated the quote while signaling as Janie had, "she’s saying she can’t quote the second movie, just the first."

"Convenient, "Beth said as she turned to Liam, "I’m going to do a little training with Taylor. When I come back here, he can have an answer for me or he can die."

"I thought," Liam said, "he said Janie had to stay near you to a certain degree."

"She does," David answered.

"Must have slipped my mind," Beth teased, "I don’t suppose you could offer her a little advice for the road, then."

David took a deep breath and looked Janie in the eye. Janie shrugged and shook her head. Suddenly the perfect idea occurred to him, David snapped his fingers and indicated Janie.

"Ray’s gone bye-bye," he said, "Venkman says that Ray has gone bye-bye in the first film and that Ray’s gone bye-bye in the second. If you can focus on that line you can use it as a bridge. It works? We’ll have a tool for getting you to make more progress later. It doesn’t …"

"Dave goes bye-bye," Beth offered.

"Exactly."

"Don’t let him sucker you while I’m gone."

"Would you like me," Liam kidded, "to lock him in a broom closet for you?"

"Yes," Beth said, not kidding, and she left Liam’s lab with Janie in psychic tow as the ghost muttered to herself again and again "Ray has gone bye-bye. Ray has gone bye-bye."

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Taylor was already in the gym when Beth and Janie got there, she wore an orangey-pink racerback and green leggings. Janie always envied and adored how Taylor’s dark complexion coupled with bright colors made her look like a flower. Janie was officially distracted from trying to save David’s life.

"What are you wearing?" Beth asked Taylor.

"Workout clothes, are we not training?"

"Yeah, we’re training, but first you need to explain the fact that you’re wearing a push-up under your sports bra."

"Well … " Taylor motioned a lot with her hands, but couldn’t quite convince any words to come out.

"Are you seriously thinking Janie’s here right now? Are you dressed to impress my dead sister?"

Janie’s corporeal heart would have skipped a beat if she still had use of it.

"Well, yeah," Taylor said, "I mean I hoped. Hope. Hoped? Did you test him already?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"Inconclusive." Beth put on her target mitts and waved for Taylor to focus.

"Great! What does that mean?"

"It means if I go back to the lab and he can’t answer a simple question, I’ll kill him."

"You can’t kill him."

"Taylor -" Beth signaled again for Taylor to jump into training mode.

"But you’ll go to prison. Hemo sapiens are afforded the same rights as homo sapiens so long as they register their species status and refrain from drinking from all live creatures, human or otherwise."

Janie sighed relief, someone had been studying.

"Thanks," Beth said, "but I’ll take my chances."

"But if you go to prison you won’t be around to help stop whoever it is that keeps suckering people into revving and you sure as hell won’t be where I need you, helping me pass my Sallies."

"Liam can help you. I’m in a killing a mood. Let’s train."

"No."

"Taylor."

"Tell me about this simple question you asked him."

"Taylor."

"Beth."

"I will drop kick you across the room if you don’t get yourself ready."

"You can drop kick me across the room and tell me about the question at the same time." Taylor stomped her foot for emphasis before her face fell to moping as she realized what she had said.

"Oh, fine," Beth said, rolling her eyes, "I told him she needed to tell him a quote from the second Ghostbusters but according to him she can only quote the first movie. He has until I get back to him to get the quote."

"Ray has gone bye-bye. Ray has gone bye-bye," Janie began to chant when she realized she hadn’t been working at her puzzle.

"So, Janie’s with him right now trying to figure out how to tell him?" Taylor asked, planting her feet to run mitt drills.

"No, apparently she’s stuck to me, but he gave her homework or some crap." Beth replied.

"Ray has gone bye-bye. Ray has gone bye-bye."

"That sounds like a test for Janie," Taylor cried, "not the sucker!"

"Ray has gone bye-bye."

"What if she really is here?" Taylor’s punches picked up momentum.

"Ray has gone bye-bye."

"What if she’s fighting to talk to us?"

"Ray has gone bye-bye."

"What if she really can’t give him the answer you want?" Taylor’s punches landed harder.

"Ray has gone bye-bye."

"What if you kill him and she has unfinished business and can’t finish it because you killed him?" Taylor picked up the pace.

"Ray’s gone bye-bye." Janie felt different.

"You’d go to prison."

"Ray’s gone bye-bye?" Janie felt stronger.

"You said that before," Beth sighed.

"Ray’s gone bye-bye," Janie was thrilled.

"Did it stop being a good reason not to kill him in the last five seconds?" Taylor growled, the dark irises of her eyes turning golden.

"Ray’s gone bye-bye! Ray’s gone bye-bye! Ray’s gone bye-bye!" Janie yelled it again and again, her eyes shut tight as she thought grateful thoughts to David and jumping around like an idiot.

"Janie?" David asked.

Janie stopped jumping up and down and opened her eyes to find herself face-to-face with David in a holding room. She gave him a questioning look.

"Liam said Beth couldn’t fault him if he put me in what amounts to broom closet, but for people … I’m paraphrasing."

Janie nodded in recognition and then a smile crept across her face.

"I take it," David said, "Ray’s gone bye-bye?"

Janie nodded and started to bounce up and down a little.

"Is there something you want to tell me? Something that could keep my head attached to my body?"

Janie took a couple steps back, dropped to her knees, and continually bowed low to the ground crooning again and again to David, "Command me, Lord! Command me, Lord!"