---

Today was amazing! My mom fed me the most amazing conch stew and johnny bread I’ve ever had in my life! My dad was laying on the couch watching the news of how a panda had recently been born at the zoo and my little brother was playing with his toy aeroplanes near the dining room table.

My mom had the most beautiful eyes. They were hazel, just like mine. Everything about my mom was so perfect. Except for me. I love her so much. I think I have a nose like my dad, a little bit sharp and pointing a little bit up into the world but elegant nonetheless. My hair was some sort of fusion between my mom’s soft, wavy brunette hair and my dad’s straight, jet black hair. You aren’t one of them. I love my family. I love my home. They don’t love you.

It was a comfy home, nothing too extravagant, but there was a wide hallway, a large living room with a huge television right on the wall and an open floor plan, there was a kitchen with one of those fancy cooking islands in the middle, we even had a bar to serve guests! Leave this place. I had my own room, it was full of boy things like action figures and monster trucks and race car beds that I loved so dearly, but my dresses on the wall still made me feel so beautiful. This place will be your demise. I actually might try on one of my dresses today. I haven’t worn one in so long. Leave before it’s too late.

I started my period a few days ago. At first, it was just a few cramps making my organs feel like they were being squeezed a little bit in a dull, painful ache. But that was just the warning. I nearly went all day in just my underwear and that would’ve ruined my dress for sure. But thank god I changed just in time.

I really should apologise for yelling at my mom the other day. It was just a bagel that was dropped on the floor but I acted as if it was the end of the world. God, I’m so glad this is nearly over. Your suffering has only just begun. They’ve been getting worse recently, I think the doctor called it something like endometriosis? I heard that a friend had something similar and hers stopped getting worse when she was 14, so I hope mine follow suit. Well, none of that matters now, anyway.

I can’t wait to wear this dress. It’s not the most expensive dress in the world, but it would look beautiful on me. This would be the second time I’ve worn it. Why won’t you leave? It’s a frilly pink dress which goes down to just halfway up my thigh and has a huge puff. It’s usually not my style but, I don’t know. There’s just something about it that I like.

---

“Kid! I mean, Riley! Wake up, we gotta go!”

It was just a dream… For the first time in my life, I was normal and it was all just a dream…

“What, what, what, what? What’s going on?”

As one might imagine, being woken up with no idea what’s going on after only a few hours of sleep in the middle of a cold, damp alleyway next to a dumpster isn’t exactly my favourite thing in the whole world. Even my dreams bring me pain.

“We have to get to the city centre or we’ll miss it!” Gui said as his eyes started to light up the alleyway. Even with the skyscrapers looming over us, with giant propaganda signs and various adverts plastered from corner to corner, he still had such hope.

“What are we going to miss? Can’t it wait five more minutes?”

“No way! The parade is today and I never miss it!” Each word that came out of his mouth breathed new life into his whole body. He’s nothing like the fearful, secretive man I met yesterday. “I’ve been going to this parade for as long as I can remember. For at least the past 20 years. I’m not going to miss the parade for the first time in twenty years just because I found you again.”

“Found me again? What do you mean found me again?”

“No time to explain! It’s daytime so we just have to blend in. Just follow my lead and we’ll be there before they even start moving the first float. Do you have any other clothes? You stink. People will look at us funny.”

As peculiar as he was right now, it was kind of nice to have someone to care about me for once. Instead of having the Apsolutus stare at me like I was some sort of infectious disease that they could inhale and die from.

“Everything I owned was in that box. It wasn’t much of anything, though. I ran out of money for food a few days ago and I only had two or three shirts and pants I could rotate between. The last time I washed them was last week, I think.”

“Well, we can’t go if you’re starving and dirty. Why didn’t you tell me you were hungry?”

“I… I’ve had no one to tell for nearly two years.”

“Well, That’s not a problem at all anymore. Come with me.”

Without saying another word, he grabbed me just started to walk. We walked towards the endless stream of people, bobbing and weaving over trash left for the patrollers to take care of.

“Where are we going?” I said a little bit over joyously as my curiosity outweighed any suspicions I could have. I shouldn’t be here.

“Would you just come already?” He said with a slight grin on his face.

As we emerged from the shadows of the alleyway into the hustle and bustle of everyday life, people didn’t even so much as bat an eyelid at us. Walls of people moved in great, big herds, crossing the street as a confluent blob from one sidewalk to the next. Each pair of eyes too busy with their own day to day life to be bothered by our existence.

Run.

I have no idea why Dravia has so many skyscrapers but they all have giant, elegant billboards and signs. Everything from lotion to snowmobiles was on them. Everything in this town seemed to be forever changing. Never staying the same. I once had a dream that seemed to take place in some far away land so similar to here but not quite. I think it was called “Tokyo”, but that is such an odd name for a city.

My city name, Dolbrin, is so much better.

The buildings are endlessly taller than that of Tokyo and each building truly scrapes the top of the sky. It only scrapes the barriers of your mind. Some people even have these rooftop gardens but it’s such a hassle to get them that not many people in the city have them. Only a fool wouldn’t.

Once, I saw a plant. It was the most beautiful thing had ever seen. I don’t know how it survives without eating anything but if I could have a dream life, it would be to be a plant. To just exist and not have to worry about anything would be the best.

“We’re here,” Gui said in an absurdly upbeat tone.

“Where’s here?”

“The one stop shop for clothes, accessories and anything else your little heart desires. Go wild, I’m buying.”

“I… I can’t. You need to save your dalyerns for something more important like food!”

“Don’t worry about it! I won’t run out of dalyerns for a long time, so buy anything you want.”

It was such a beautiful store. Much more beautiful on the inside than the outside. The inside was so clean and white and pure. The staff wore these jet black shirts, pants and shoes with little “Frantoast’s” sewn into the fabric of the shirt. This was surely the first time I’ve ever seen a shirt with a pocket. And it will surely be the last.

“Frantoast? Isn’t this one of the most expensive malls in the city?”

“I thought you didn’t know anything about Dravia.”

“Well, my parents did tell me a few things before they kicked me out. Why are we here? We could be anywhere but we’re here. That shirt costs 300 dalyerns!”

“This place has the best of the best. I don’t believe you’ll need to replace anything that you get here for a while. Trust me, you can buy anything you want and I’ll pay the bill.”

It was the first time in my life that I got to go shopping for myself. It was the first time I got to go shopping, actually. First, we were in Frantoast, where I was trying on some new shirts and pants and then we were in Dalora where I got to try some amazing new shoes. On the way to Yorg, we got to stop for some sort of hotdog dipped in cooked pancake batter on a stick contraption. I think they call it a “corndog”? It was the best thing I’ve ever had. It was the only thing I’ve had to eat in the past three days. And it may be the last. In Yorg, there was no way I could let Gui see but, I got to try on my first real dress. This wasn’t a dream. This was without a doubt in my mind, reality.

It felt amazing. It felt perfect. It felt like for the first time, I belonged. I want this feeling to last forever.

Nothing lasts forever.

“You almost done in there?” Gui called towards the changing room.

“Yeah, give me a minute!”

When I came out of the changing room, there were no words for the feeling that I had. Just a few hours ago, I was starving, dirty and only just learning how to not be alone but all of that has finally changed now. I finally have a friend.

Gui seemed near puzzled when he said, “I’ve never seen you in a dress before. Do you like it?”

“I… I…”

There’s no way that I could show my face to him again. It was a dress. An insanely expensive dress at that. He probably thought I looked idiotic trying to look like a princess after being in the street for so many days. For so many years. Tears engulfed my eye, leaving a centimetre of eyeball untouched by the brine river as the tears flowed down my face as I ran back to the changing rooms.

I’m so stupid.

The dress was on the floor before my brain registered that my arms were moving. I had my new hoodie on.

God, going out there will be so embarrassing. You don’t have to, you can just run away. But I can’t just run away. I can’t just run away from my problems. Not again. Especially not with Gui. He’s been nothing but kind to me, I have to at least show my face to him again. Just run while you still can. Don’t let another one in close. I guess this is just the inevitable part of me letting someone in.

“Ehm… Are you okay?” Gui said timidly before continuing in a more sanguine tone. “We can leave if you’d like. I don’t like this store much either. Too lacey.”

“Yea… Too expensive…”

An imperturbable tranquillity came over Gui before he uttered his next words. “No, I never said too expensive. It has too much lace, the store does. Lace rips too easily and it’s just such a hassle if you own it. Frills are more my style if I’m honest. But c’mon we gotta go, else we’re going to miss the parade!”

“You go on ahead, I have to put back a few things.”

“There’s no time!”

Before I could even attempt to refute his statement, Gui had already speed walked past me on his way to the changing rooms to gather all of the clothes I had left on the floor. To gather the dress I had left on the floor. Hopefully, he knows where I got all of those things from, I’d feel bad is they were left throw randomly about the store. Don’t let him in. It would be a real shame.

Don’t.

He was back in less than a heartbeat and said: “I’ll ring these up and we can head to the parade, okay?”

“Y-you don’t h-have to do th-that. I c-can put th-them back.”

Somehow these words left my face before my brain decided that they had permission to leave. They came out in chunks. Giant spurts, like the very last bits of a squeeze bottle of BBQ sauce. I wonder what BBQ tastes like. They always show commercials of it on the big screens downtown. I kind of want another hotdog on a stick. Pancake dog? Corndog!

“You’re insane. It’d take forever to put all of these back. C’mon, let’s go to a cashier before a line starts, you can put everything in my backpack so we don’t have to giant bags to lug around everywhere. I don’t want to be late for the parade!”

And just like that, I owned my first dress. My very first ever.

Don’t let him in. Don’t let him know.

Run.

Next Chapter: Chapter Three