“The stairs”
My spiritual journey

My Day started plain and boring like any other day. My alarm went crazy and called it time to wake up.

Before I leave home, I took a good look at the mirror before our flat’s door; I am dressed as always black top, black jeans and blood red scarves –which was as dreadful as my outfit- and to complete my favorite look; I work my silver royal ring in my left hand and two blood red witchy rings in my right hand.

“I am complete” my reflection did not look pleased as my words because after all it’s not my dream job but I needed a job. It was Sunday, the first day of my life in the 30s and also the first day at schools so it was hard to even find a ride to work.

 I had to take a bus –not a seat empty-. I was close to my work, I yelled to the driver to stop but he kept on going “Damn that driver, even not I was already late” I shouted and expected him to yell at me but his reply came politely “I’m sorry old lady, let me give you a hand” I was shocked to see that young boy driving and he even helped me out of the bus till the street.

“Do I look that old? I am just 30 and everyone thought me to look very young for my age” I thought to my both very late and sorry self.

I walked further and I was completely lost “To call the day off then and ask for help,” I thought while looking around for a sign or a human to help me but all completely came as new. I was not familiar with the place. I even tried to find military police station –It supposed to be the safest place in this desert-. I took the first corner and finally found buildings and a man leaning on the shortest of them. He was dressed in a blue slim fit suite—not military clothes, stood in the shadow, carrying a red back page, he was looking down and I did not see his face. “Hello, can you please tell me where is the…” before I finish my words he looked at me and I jumped in the air “Professor? Is that you?”

He looked at me and smiled “Yes, it’s me”. Forgetting that I was lost “I have been looking all over for you, it has been ages and you don’t even reply your inbox”. He said calmly “I do know you left the university.” And smiled again. I rolled my eyes “that humiliating, ungrateful and awful place. They never understood me, they were awful to me and I tried so hard to find and tell you.” My tone was getting louder.

 “I have a task for you, Neveen” he turned and walked to the biggest and highest military building.

I followed him without a word, I love tasks and for each job I wanted to have—a task.

“I am used to tasks, nothing intimidates me anymore.” I grinned and did not notice that he passed a locked door with the largest lock I’ve ever seen in my life “Now, your turn” he was very calm with a crazy offer but I did not want to make him think bad of me. I gathered my strength and pushed the door “It was not already locked” I raised an eye brow.

He laughs “Correct. Indeed, you have what others die to own and pay to obtain”

I cried in anger “Nothing, I should have been a university professor like my father always wanted”

His reaction was peaceful and very calm “Wrong”.

I did not let him finish and said “Pay to know what? That it’s a great lock but not locking any door and it’s for decoration.”

 “You are now welcomed to enter” he stretched his arm welcoming me.

I entered a very classic looking hall with a high ceiling and a roof dividing it to a second floor which was made into an office. There was nothing in this hall but a door, after it stairs leading to the office and a very high seat.

“Neveen, you have to pay respect” My professor granting my attention to the circle of people in the middle of the hall. I knew exactly the circle, all those who treated me bad, especially that old lady in grey and that dean of the university with his green snake eyes. I smiled in pride “Hello”

“Open the door, take the stairs to the office, you have earned it” my professor pointed. Now, that was very easy. I got to the office which was loaded with sportive clothes and equipment. I looked down at the circle “That’s very high” I fear heights. I was going to leave down again but the stairs disappeared.

My professor’s voice came challenging “No way down, think. Remember, that seat was for a very powerful but yet a kind lady. She owns the place and an empire for business”.

Nothing but that high chair which needed a jump to reach. I hesitated for a moment, jumped and missed. I kept in falling near the chair but still inside the room. Finally after trying for the 25th time and my fear is washed away, I made it. I was on the chair and took it down.

“Very well, you are now the master of the circle and can order then whatever you want” my professor seemed pleased.

I jumped from joy “I have a quest for them”. I thought of the quest and what I wish suddenly appeared on nowhere—a bow, arrows and target face. I ordered them to try the game which they used to mock me for. They all failed and my professor as me to try and even myself aimed correctly but the arrow landed just under the golden circle into the target and I was not pleased.

“Bravo, you did it. Now you can keep the bow and set of arrows” My professor applauseed

“It landed lower” I looked to the floor and was about to let my tears down.

He raised a finger to my face “Wrong, you aimed too perfect in a low place. You were better.”

Not letting me speak a word, he continued “The next task” and with his words, the office disappeared and was replaced by more stairs, but this time they were a story high with tangled robes on the floor.

My professor was on the second story now and pointed me to follow him. I cried in anger “You are kidding me” and took the robes. I almost fall down, my arms did not carry me because I was out of fitness. I cried and almost let the pain take over me and free my muscles of this pain.

“What better for a book worm than books?” A voice of a girl came from the 4th floor. I looked up to find a bookstore on the 2nd floor. The girl contained “All would be yours and you just have to reach them.”

I had to go Tarzan and jump to the rob leading to the 2nd floor, adding that the stairs to it were only fitting for one foot. I could not let the books go, they are my beloved and passion. I made to another rob, carrying myself and ignoring my pain. Another rob, I firmed my hand on the last rob, put my right foot on the narrow stair and carried myself up to the books. I had my tears down my cheeks as I saw all the books, book goodies and things out of my dream alive over that store which is now mine.

I left the book store as I noticed a store with rings, I walked to it to find that girl again “Hello” she shakes my hand. She was shining, happy, wearing dark clothes, beautiful rings decorated her fingers and she was my age. She fixes her pinkish-red hair “you must be wondering about the place.”

I hesitated to reply but my professor left me alone and I need answers “Yes!”

She played with her rings “It’s a Mall and you are late for shopping. Follow me” she ordered.

  Following her was a story out of a dream because this place had all that I dreamt of. My wishes were just a store away. Except for that tunnel with stories with yellowish colours as of old paper, dirty corridors and people giving me strange looks. I felt like a stranger in a strange land. I heard my name from far “Neveen, get back here”. I took the corridor back to the shiny stores and found her in front of a store decorated with classy décor “Where have you been” she was furious and continued “why did you go there?”. I smiled shyly “I was discovering!”

She took a deep breath “That place—where you went—is not of your level. Please don’t go back there.”

“Alright, it was scary.” I had to agree with her. She entered the classy store and picked an outfit for me. I was excited to finally wear the style I had over Pinterest but not in real life. Finally, I am dressed up myself.

She was silent and walked out of the story for a while as I followed. A rounded great hall again with a dusty red crest on the floor. The girl walked over the crest leaving foot prints in the dust “If you can enter; they are yours” she turned and gave me her back. It was easy for her to enter; then how hard it would be for me? I tried to enter but the air was closing on me, pushing me away and I was breathless. I tried for million times as she stood in silence. I tried to cover my face and enter by the right side of my body. I was fighting to enter but finally made it and everything was clean. “Sometimes you have to bend, win over the wind and not taking the see by your chest” she looked down and her heel knocked on the floor.

“The assassin’s creed games, books and goodies are yours” she smiled at me.

I was thrilled, played with everything, tried every game and took photos with every outfit. Forgetting about the time and how it was already sun set. “Time to go home” she called and a door to my street appeared. I was about to leave but she stopped and took a look at the mirror “Your turn, please take a look before you go”. I stood right next to her, she fixed my outfit “Now, take a look at yourself.”

I could not believe myself of how my black outfit was perfect as I wish and those wonderful gipsy rings. I smiled at my reflection and before I exit the door and thank her she whispered “That reflection is truly yourself and what you have always deserved” then she hugged me and diapered.

I opened my eyes and I was in my room with my family. I have no idea on how have I got back but I was still with my work outfit. I don’t know if this was a dream or reality. I still wonder if I did have a spiritual journey with myself.