J.W.Hollingshead followed Michael Valdez

Michael Valdez

I like making worlds, throwing wrenches in their works, and making characters pull out the wrench. V...

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Michael Valdez liked an update for Blue Water

FROM THE BLOG DIARY OF EMILY HUNTER

Entry #8: August 8, 2013

That was embarrassing. So I feel like I have some splaining to do.

First of all, I don’t always make the best decisions.

My medication doesn’t mix well with alcohol. For this reason I don’t drink. Normally.

Not sure why, because it’s all pretty hazy, but for some reason, I decided to break that rule. I feel like someone asked me to go out with them, but I can’t remember who. I honestly can’t imagine who it would be. Probably someone from work. Two days are a bit of a blur. Actually "blur" isn’t the correct term. A wash is more like it. I don’t remember really any of it.

I did a pill count, and I didn’t take my meds for five days (I know I missed a few doses, I didn’t realize it was that many.) The first thing I remember is waking up this morning at 5am in a bed at Malcolm Crisis Unit. Apparently my mom took me there. She has found my blog as I had feared. (Just kidding mom.) Dr. Harper met us there. I had an emergency shot of haloperidol, and stayed for observation for a night. I just got home two hours ago.

Mom said she called me after finding my blog, and I answered crying, begging her to let me come home from the hospital. Apparently I thought I was back at Sandy Shores.

Great. Now I have to explain that. I promise I will. Let me finish this train of thought first.

So she came to pick me up from my apartment. I wouldn’t let her in. She said I thought she was a rapist and I wouldn’t let her into the door. (That’s new.) So I called 911 from inside the apartment and said some man was trying to get in and hurt me again.

Now I must take a break here, because I know what you might be thinking. I suffered some molestation or trauma as a child and suppressed it, and that’s where all my issues started. And after reading this series of events, I’d start thinking that too. Never happened. I’ve never even been touched in a weird way. My parents were pretty protective, almost to a fault. This rape fear is just a paranoid thing, I’m sure. And I honestly don’t know why I said "again." Not only have I never been assaulted, I’ve never even been scared of it in this way before. If you’re looking for things to make sense while I’m completely decomped, good luck. I was convinced I killed a staff member at Sandy Shores, and was going to prison for the rest of my life. (Again, more on this later.) I also had a paranoid fear that I’d become a suicide bomber after watching the news during the Iraq War. I’d have panic attacks about it.

Anyway, the police show up and see my mom outside the door. She explains the situation, they see she’s not a big man trying to break in. They cut the chain on my door and bring me to crisis services. The rest is history. Blurry, blurry history.

So. Sandy Shores. Here we go.

Sandy Shores is a residential mental health facility. I lived there for a few years starting when I was 21. The reason why is a source of controversy, but being that this is my blog, and I was the only one there, it was because I was in an accident. That’s all. Nothing more than that, despite what my parents think.

So anyway, I was there for a while. I met some really interesting people. The food was terrible, and usually cold. The staff were horrible assholes. Seriously, they sucked at life. Not all of them, I’m not being fair. A couple were nice. Not enough of them though. I could go on. I won’t. They were the worst people. I’ll assume you understand.

Anyway, I was there for about five years until I was no longer deemed a suicide risk, (again, it was an accident, I was never a suicide risk), and I got my own apartment in a supported independent living environment. I had to check in everyday, go to a central office, (which was just another apartment in the complex,) to get my meds everyday. I could have visitors and even overnights if I cleared it with the office first. After being there for a while, I was able to move to the apartment I have now, all on my own.

When I got out of Sandy Shores, I started seeing Dr. Winchcombe again. (He was my psych doctor before the accident, and my parents decided it wasn’t in "my best interest" to see him anymore after that. But being that I could make my own decisions, I went back to him.) Eventually and unfortunately, he transferred me to Dr. Harper who specializes in "odd" cases of schizophrenia. (No offense Dr. Harper. I just liked Dr. Winchcombe a lot. He also was the first person to look past my diagnosis and see I was originally misdiagnosed, instead of reading my file and just assuming he knew me. I wish I still saw him sometimes, but I blew it.)

So, that pretty much brings you up to speed on my life. The relevant details at least. I see Dr. Harper every week, take my meds myself (mostly.)

And I’ll give Dr. Harper some credit. Her idea for me to write this stuff out is helping I think. It doesn’t always feel like it, but I think I got a lot out this week. I feel a little lighter. I’m smiling. That’s got to count for something, right?

Okay, that’s good. I have to clean my apartment now.

Adios,
Emily

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Michael Valdez liked an update for The Animal in Man

The Animal in Man is done. I can hardly believe it. No one doubted that this day would ever actually arrive more than me, I assure you. After months of what I called Radio Silence, I’m back - fingers trembling - to send out this reader update.

So what happens now? Well, I’ve sent all 350+ pages to Inkshares just an hour ago, and from there they’ll put together my production timeline and all the other wonderful things they provide. I’ll collaborate with them to nail down some ideas for the final cover design. In the months that follow there will be edits… load upon load of edits. The more meticulous work, you see, is really just starting.

I’ve never finished a project this massive in all my life, and yet, it’s not entirely finished. Still, I can’t contain my excitement. This is a turning point for me, and I couldn’t have done it without all the follows, all the interest (all the pre-orders!) for The Animal in Man. I just wanted to thank you all for your continued support. You’ll be hearing from me on the reg from now on!

(“Natural Collapse” - Design by Diogo Hornburg via threadless.com)

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Michael Valdez liked an update for Battle Flag: The Road To Hell

Well 2 weeks to go with 12 orders total.

Barring some downright miraculous surge in orders it looks like this book isn’t going to happen, at least not right now.

Am I going to ask for an extension? Probably not.

Am I going to give up? No.

If this fails I’m going to let it sit in draft phase for a bit and shift my focus over to my other book The Agoge. I’m also going to rearrange the Battle Flag project front page to be a little clearer on the overall goals for the series and I’ll rearrange the sample chapters too.

Here’s hoping for a miracle!

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Michael Valdez liked an update for Beneath White Clouds

Big news!

Beneath White Clouds has been finished for some time. Finished as in beginning-middle-end, but there is always room for improvement. To that end, I have acquired the services of an editor. I won’t say who, because we have not yet had the conversation as to whether she prefers to be behind-the-scenes or not, but we’ve worked together before and this lady’s got chops.

Why an editor? Know how it takes a village to raise a child? Same thing with books. Don’t care how bomb of an author you think you are, you need someone impartial to rake your work over the coals before you let it loose. Whether I hit my funding goal on Inkshares or self-publish this novel, I want it to be good and shiny for all of you.

I love this story. I wanted to build a tale that wears a fun disguise, invites you in for a good time and suckerpunches you with the horror and the heavy. That’s the impact I’m going for, and G is going to help me make sure that’s the punch this story delivers.

I still need your help - don’t hold back on those pre-orders. Bring your friends in with you. Tell your co-workers, your tabletop game-night group, your yoga buddies, the lady working at your favorite comic shop. There are lots of sci-fi fans out there. I only need 250 of them. How many do you know?

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Michael Valdez liked an update for How to Get Run Over by a Truck

Dear Sweethearts,

I got up yesterday morning at 5 am to workout. As I dressed in the gray morning light, it reminded me of the years that I would force myself to get up at 5 am and drag myself to my computer to bang out bits and pieces of my memoir for the 2 hours I had before commuting into work. It was the quietest that my Brooklyn neighborhood was all day. It felt like I was the only person awake in the world. It was lonely, but it felt right.

I struggled to put my feelings into words. I wanted to be honest with myself about who I was, how I felt and who I was trying to be. I did my best not to flinch about my ugly feelings, to stare deeply into my own mortality, fragility and also to dive in deeper past the negativity, to the beautiful hidden places where joy lived.

I spent my lunch hours tucked out of sight in unused cubicles in the back of the open trading desk where I worked - editing, crying, laughing. My evenings would bring me back to the same spot at the little desk in my bedroom, eating pretzels sipping tea and trying to get all of my memories out, writing with the fervor of a dying woman who didn’t want her life to get lost to time.

I wrote to make the pain more comprehensible, I wrote for old Katie because her story deserved to be told, and I wrote for the the stranger living somewhere in the world who might need a story like this, when they are feeling particularly hopeless. I wanted to tell them that the impossible happens all the time, we just don’t talk about it. It’s ok to be scared, it’s ok to laugh, it’s ok to cry - I usually do those three things in tandem. Even though I was writing this at my little desk by myself in Williamsburg - I wanted for the stranger to know, that they aren’t alone. I’ve been there too.

I tried to make this book possible by myself, I sent it out to 75 agents across the country, I received their rejections, their emails and letters that told me that I wasn’t a good enough writer that the story wasn’t compelling enough, that no one would ever buy this book, I should hire a ghost writer. I took it to heart and I swallowed the rejection alone.

Then, I found Inkshares, and suddenly other writers were telling me that this book was something they thought was worth reading. From there, I found all of you, and I heard you saying "We believe in you. We’ll make this happen - we can do it together." And just like that, I wasn’t alone any more. How to Get Run Over by a Truck stopped being just my story - it became all of ours.

I know that it is an imperfect piece of art, but it is a reflection of me and all of the pieces I tried to fit back together. I love you for opening up your hearts to this story, to this book, and to me. There is no other way I could imagine bringing this book into the world today. Thank you for standing with me. To me, you are perfection.

Thank you for making this book possible. Yesterday was one of the proudest days of my life. I saw the book I have worked so hard on for years in the hands of people that I love, I got to read from the book in front of over 100 people who packed themselves into the KGB Bar on the Lower East Side of Manhattan. I cried and I laughed with people I knew, and with strangers. It was incredible. Thank you for being a part of this amazing journey. I hope that you are enjoying your books! If you are, if you’d be willing to take a moment to leave a short review here on amazon.com’s website, I would be SO grateful! It will direct new people to the book, and hopefully get it into the hands of more people who need to hear this kind of a story!

I will be forever grateful for your kindness and for your support - thank you for changing the course of my life

Heart,

Katie

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Michael Valdez liked an update for Sunshine is Forever

750! THANK YOU!

When I first found out about Inkshares, my goal was to get to 250 preorders and accept the lower tier publishing deal. I honestly did not think I would come anywhere close to 750 preorders. I am in awe of the amount of support, encouragement, and attention my book has gotten so far! Thank you so much for investing in this project. I really hope you love the book when it comes out.

So where do we go from here? I am going to send my manuscript to Inkshares as soon as possible. After they evaluate my manuscript, I will work with my assigned editor to get Sunshine is Forever into the best possible shape. A design team will redesign the cover and interior of the book. After that, the release date will be announced! I will email out updates periodically to let you know where the book is in the publishing process, but rest assured, you will receive your copy when it is ready!

You can help by continuing to spread the word. Just because the funding stage is done, doesn’t mean you should stop telling people about Sunshine is Forever. My next goal is to make Sunshine is Forever a Bestseller. Keep telling your friends!!!

This is the first of many books to come, so I hope that you like Sunshine is Forever enough to preorder/order my next book when the time arrives! If you want to stay in touch, feel free to friend me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, and Instagram.

www.facebook.com/kyletcowan

www.twitter.com/kyletcowan

www.instagram.com/kyletcowan

As a final note, Jamison Stone (another Inkshares author) was an instrumental part to the success of my campaign. I hope you will check out his book Rune of the Apprentice, which will be available November 1st in stores nationwide. https://www.inkshares.com/books/rune-of-the-apprentice

Thank you all for the help! Crowdfunding is one of the hardest, most rewarding things I have ever done. This is my second time funding a project this way, and it won’t be the last. Inkshares, Kickstarter, IndieGoGo, and Seed and Spark are proving that crowdfunding is the way of the future for independent/undiscovered talent. Please continue to help your friends, because you never know when you might need to ask for support.

I appreciate each and every single one of you. Now I am going to get back to doing what I love, writing.

Kyle T. Cowan

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