Nov 12, 2015

Extract from Chapter 29 of mystery-comedy novel, 'The Investigations of the Para-Usual':

‘Tell me what you know,’ said Persil in a curly Scottish accent.

‘Well, this here is our operations board…’ O’Singh begun to explain, in an uncharacteristically flat tone. The atmosphere in the IPU laboratory, too, lacked vigour.

‘No, no,’ said Persil, abruptly, reverting to her clipped English accent. ‘Tell me what you know about what I just said.’

‘Uh, let me see now,’ said O’Singh, at a loss. ‘You asked me what I know.’

‘Yes, I did!’ replied Persil petulantly, ‘but I said it in a funny voice. In Scottish!’ she said, confounded by O’Singh’s slowness on the uptake. ‘Don’t you know anything?’ she said, suddenly now laughing. ‘I do impersonations of people.’

‘Oh?’ said O’Singh, more perplexed than interested. ‘Who were you impersonating?’ he asked, out of politeness.

‘Mary Queen of Scots.’

‘Mary Queen of Scots the 16th century Queen of England?’ asked O’Singh.

‘Duh!’ commented Persil.

‘And Mary Queen of Scots famously said, “Tell me what you know”?’ persevered O’Singh.

‘I don’t know,’ replied Persil, agitatedly. ‘Most people would have to say “Tell me what you know” at some stage in their life, wouldn’t they? Whether they’re famous for it or not. Mary was no different.’