Nov 11, 2015

Extract from Chapter 28 of mystery-comedy novel, 'The Investigations of the Para-Usual':

‘... And if I may go one step further, as it were gentlemen, and, of course, gentlelady,’ said O’Singh, including the young woman, ‘we may make one more connection.’

O’Singh wrote again on the board a further link: Airport Stair Vans – Zebra Crossings

‘Zebra crossings?’ enquired Cohen, not a little curious.

‘Do not let him squander any more of your time, sir,’ urged Woo.

‘If I may prevail, zebra crossings we know can also help people with issues of low self-esteem because they empower. Anyone, no matter how wretched, may approach a zebra crossing and cars are compelled to stop for them. The so-called ‘wretch’ senses, “I am worth something at least – I am worth not running over.”’

‘And how does that help us?’ asked Cohen.

‘Similarly, how does that hinder us?’ added Woo, keen to say something to back up the politician.

‘Dr Pratt, Woo tells me you took responsibility for you and Professor O’Singh going out to make this investigation,’ said Cohen, gravely.

‘Yes I did, sir,’ answered the emboldened Dr Pratt.

‘If you had bothered to get with the program, you would realise that the Government is passionately against all forms of things that are not environmentally friendly. Especially now with all that’s been going on around us. You go out and you find good things about airports when aeroplanes are spewing out carbon dioxide like it’s going out of fashion.’

‘It is going out of fashion,’ argued Dr Pratt.

‘Okay. Well, the opposite then – like it’s coming into fashion. Woo, here, also tells me that you have acted in defiance of his authority, suggesting an attitude problem.’

‘I voice my opinion if that is what you mean, sir?’ answered Dr Pratt, defiantly.

Cohen exchanged a significant look with Woo before steeling himself to continue.

‘Dr Pratt, I’m afraid we are going to have to let you go.’