only went up to weave the sentence before has her taking it to the seamstress shop, where it’s in the attic
actually you have it in the attic and the basement. She shows it to the Uncle first in the attic. But later all the nobles are convinced its in the basement.
The world is dark and broken after the god-king’s ambition nearly destroyed it. Jak Fuller is an orphan whose love of stories has led him to wander in search of legends. Soon it leads him to the allure of dark magic...
Chapter 3 introduces Nermel. He is a psychic goblin with a lisp. Please let me know if the lisp is hard to understand or if you can think of a better way to put his dialogue so it is understood by the reader. I went replacing s’s with th’s and f’s with ph’s when he is upset.
Just posted Chapter 1. Let me know what you think. I know I’m not perfect, That’s what I want an editor for. It’s funny how having read and reread this I keep finding things that aren’t quite right.
It’s long still, but there was so much I cut out and dropped. There was a whole bit where Voem finds one of the library helper spirits trying to tell him something by writing it in the mop water. But I dropped it because there isn’t room to explain how the helper spirits are keyed to the chief librarian, so only he (who is now dead) could have communicated with them clearly. Until the new chief librarian is anointed they can’t communicate clearly with anyone.
The spirit was trying to direct Voem towards a secret passage, The spirit had been trying to get Voem’s attention since the other librarians were ignoring it. The librarians had seen its motions but knew it couldn’t talk to them. They were too accustomed to the rules commanding the spirit that they didn’t realize there were other ways to communicate. But this book is too long anyway. And I was still introducing characters...
only went up to weave
the sentence before has her taking it to the seamstress shop, where it’s in the attic