THE DON’TS
OF
SAYING
I DO
How to plan your wedding within budget
and still keep your friends
By Karen Leah Scott and Scott Photography
Most people think weddings are hectic, stressful and
expensive. They can be but don’t have to be. With a little
imagination, a little creativity, some great friends
and early planning, you can have the wedding of your dreams for half the cost.
It’s a beautiful spring day. The sun is shining, birds are singing. You are spending a wonderful afternoon with the man you love. Strolling hand in hand, you stop occasionally to steal a kiss and whisper words of endearment to each other. Life is so wonderful when you are in love. Suddenly, he gets down on one knee, looks up at you and says those four words you have always dreamed of hearing – Will you marry me. He then slips the most gorgeous ring onto your finger and you break out in tears and scream YES. You spend the rest of the day in a frenzy of trying to remember who you need to call to tell them your wonderful news. Finally, after years of dreaming about it, it has come true. You are filled with emotion. You lay in bed that night dreaming of your big day, playing repeatedly in your mind the fairy tale you have had since you were a little girl. You drift off to sleep with visions of limousines, and princesses dressed in beautiful white gowns and lavish banquet halls.
The next morning, reality hits. Yikes, I have a wedding to plan. What do I do? Where do I go? How do I do it? Where do I start? How do I pay? You can feel the stress already creeping in. The questions are endless. They keep spinning and spinning around in your mind until you get so stressed out or even worse – you turn into a BRIDZILLA, which believe me – is not pretty.
Okay so maybe the above is a little out of a fantasy world, and it doesn’t matter how your knight in shining armor proposes to you, the fact is you ARE getting married and you HAVE a wedding to plan. The reality of today is that most couples getting married have lived together for a while and have even started their families. Times have changed from the days you lived at home until the day you got married and parents paid for everything. Nowadays, couples are older and wiser and most are paying for their wedding themselves so they have a limited budget, which brings us to the reason of this book.
This book is meant to help you plan your dream wedding stress free and within a reasonable budget by giving you words of wisdom, things to think about and things to take into consideration. If you are adamant about having a big fantasy wedding with all the trimmings, and budget does not matter to you then this book is not for you. What we hope to accomplish, is that after reading this book, you will have a clear idea of what is important and what isn’t, where you can save money along the way and some of the important details that bride’s tend not to think about but can still stress them out when they do pop up. This book is based on the principle of KISS – Keep It Simple Sweetie. With over 20 years of experience of photographing weddings, we have witnessed plenty of situations that can either make or break a wedding day. We have seen areas where large amounts of money have been wasted on wedding details that aren’t really necessary. Every bride is different and all have portions of their wedding day that are more important to them than others are. For example, if flowers, music and invitations are important to you then spend the extra money and get them. If they aren’t, then think of ways to save money and use it in another area that has more meaning to you, for example, your honeymoon.
One of the most important things to remember is don’t lose sight of whose day it is. It is your day, you will want it to go smoothly, and stress free and you can’t keep everyone happy.
So get nice and comfortable, put your feet up and start reading. We hope that this book will be able to help you have a stress free wedding and still be the princess you have always dreamt of being – after all – you deserve it.
DON’T FORGET TO START BY BRAINSTORMING
One of the most important things you and your finance need to do at the very beginning is sit down and decide just what your wedding means to both of you, what is important and what isn’t. Weddings are not the traditional affairs they once were. There was a time when men were not involved in any decisions whatsoever about the wedding, nor did they want to be involved. Their responsibility was to look forward to the bachelor party and worry about not being too hung over on the wedding day. Well, those days are gone and men are voicing their opinion more and more. As women, we have been planning our wedding day since we were little girls. However, you would be surprised at the number of men who have actually put some thought into their wedding day and what they want. Times are changing and so are weddings. As I have mentioned before, most couples either have lived together for a few years, have children together or are older and more mature. They don’t want all the fuss and bother of a traditional wedding. So, before you run out and buy dresses and order flowers, you both need to sit down and set some ground rules. Find out what is important to each of you and remember this very important word – Compromise. There are so many things to take into consideration. For example, budget – one of the most important. How much money are you willing to spend for your wedding? It is hard to imagine that some people go into debt so they can have their dream wedding. So before you start writing the cheques, you need to make a plan. A lot of people don’t know how to do this simply because they don’t know where to start. What you need to do is imagine your wedding as if you are a guest or better yet, think of a wedding you have been to in the past – What do you remember about that wedding? Do you remember what the centerpieces looked like or do you remember how good the food was? Do you remember the color of the linen napkins on the tables or do you remember the music that was played? Chances are the answers would be something like this – No, I don’t remember exactly what the centerpieces looked like but I do remember the food was awful, potatoes cold, meat tough or I don’t remember the color of the napkins but I do remember that DJ. He was so good and had us up dancing all night long. By this example you can see that some areas are definitely important and require a bit more money than other areas. You can start your planning by remembering this – guests may not remember all the good things about your wedding day, but they definitely won’t forget all the bad things about your wedding. They will remember that the photographer was really pleasant and outgoing and fun and his pictures were beautiful, but won’t remember what the outside of your reception hall looked like. They will remember how beautiful you looked walking down the aisle but won’t notice or remember that the flowers were missing at the alter. So, in saying all this, when you get right down to it, the most important areas where you do need to spend a bit more money is Photography, Food and Music. Set goals for yourself, research and ask questions. The internet is a valuable source of information with so many sites that help you. Word of mouth is another valuable source, but keep in mind though, what didn’t work for one person, works for another. Make your own decisions. You may find a vendor polite, informative and great to work with while your friend or worse yet a friend of a friend of a friend, couldn’t stand them. So get out your pen and pencil on a Friday night, two glasses and bottle wine if you want, and start organizing. By doing this brainstorming session, you will be amazed at how easy planning your wedding is.
DON’T BE AFRAID TO ORGANIZE A COMMITTEE
Look at planning your wedding as a major project. You and your groom are the Project Managers and your wedding party and family and friends your employees. Your goal – to have a perfect, stress free wedding. How do you do this – easy – organize committees and start way in advance of your date. This can be a fun way to get things done plus it makes friends feel very important. You could have the Decorating Committee which could be a few people in charge of decorating the church and hall, the Round up the Family Committee – one or two friends or family members who will be responsible for gathering everyone for the wedding pictures, the Make Sure the Brides Make Up is Okay Committee and so on. I will go into more detail later throughout the book about the importance of getting people involved but right now just remember, make it fun and don’t be afraid to ask for help.
DON’T SUFFER FROM BRIDAL DRESSISITIS.
You have gazed longingly through Bridal Store windows dreaming of the day you can walk into the Store and proudly say, “I am looking for my wedding dress”. Bridal Magazines show endless gowns with miles of satin and lace, which is every girls dream. After all who doesn’t want to look like Cinderella or Lady Di on their wedding day? However, there are a few things to keep in mind when getting ready to make is major purchase. You know your taste and what you like, so stick to that. Don’t get anything that just isn’t you. The one thing that people don’t think about is that you will be wearing this dress all day and that these gowns, although beautiful, can be very heavy or hot if you are getting married during the summer. I have seen many brides, who look absolutely beautiful in their gowns, complain after about an hour of wearing their dress that they can’t wait to take it off because it is heavy or uncomfortable. It is one thing try it on in the store but a completely other thing to have to wear it for a whole day. Now keep in mind, if that is what you want, that is fine. To each his own. But most women don’t think of this. All they think about is getting the longest train possible, and the latest fashion, and I want to look like the girl on page 6 of Today’s Bride Magazine. Well, keep in mind – you won’t unless you are the girl on page 6. No matter what you look like or how slender you are, you won’t look like the page 6 Bride. Everyone is different. A gown that looks nice on one person may not suit another. So don’t go into the Bridal Boutiques with an image of yourself in a Justin McAfferty of Donna Karan because they may not fit your body shape.
So go gown shopping with an open mind. You know what you like and you know what styles suite you. Don’t buy a gown that is not you. If you are a jean and sweatshirt type of person – don’t try to find the laciest frilliest dress on the rack just because you saw it in the latest wedding magazine, it just won’t suit you and you will only get frustrated and disappointed in your search. Also, keep your selection down to a minimum, don’t go out and have 20 dresses put on hold to go back and try on. This is only another stress factor. Keep it down to either two or three. Despite all of this, the main thing to remember is when you find your dress you will know. It will be the one that makes you shine and makes you feel truly beautiful.
DON’T FORGET THE TIDE PEN
Okay girls. I am going to let you in on a little secret about your wedding dress. Are you ready…….. Here it is….. No matter how careful you are on your wedding day….. Your dress WILL get dirty. Yep, that is right, and the faster you accept this the less stress you will have. Most brides try to keep it relatively clean before the ceremony and afterwards don’t worry about it too much. Keeping the dress clean is especially impossible if it rains on your wedding day and you want out door pictures. You can’t possibly keep it clean. So don’t worry about it. No one is going to notice. The only person who will know you have a mud spot on the bottom of your dress is you – no one else. The best thing to do is put together a little care package, Tide pen, sewing kit, safety pins and a large white sheet to put under your dress for outdoor pictures. This way if something does happen, you will be prepared for anything and this means less stress.
DON’T THINK YOU NEED TO GET MARRIED IN A CHURCH
If you attend a regular parish or have a priest that is close to your family, then there is no question as to where you are getting married, but if you haven’t been to church in years and it isn’t that important to you there are many options for your wedding day. There are several companies that offer officiants who are licensed to perform marriage ceremonies and in fact will perform any type of ceremony you want, any where you want. The first thing to do is decide what is important to you and your future husband. If getting married in a church is on the top of your list, then by all means do so. If you are open to suggestions, you can look around. Consider an outdoor wedding at a spot that has special meaning for the both of you. There are many venues that have facilities available that can give you that church ambiance or even a lot of reception halls that will decorate one side of your reception room for your ceremony. Using an officiant gives you the freedom to write your own marriage ceremony. It can be a religious ceremony or non-religious – anything you want. The most important thing to remember is that the day is all about you and your future husband and the love you share.
DON’T FORGET THAT FLOWERS HAVE FEELINGS TOO
Long ago, before flowers were used in Bouquets, brides carried bouquets of herbs and garlic to ward off evil spirits as she walked down the aisle. Flowers were slowly introduced into the bridal bouquet as a symbol of fertility and everlasting love. In some cultures, where bathing was not too frequent, flowers were used because their aroma masked the fact that the bride had not bathed in a while. Whatever their purpose, you have to admit, the bridal bouquet does make the bride. Picking out your bouquet is right next to shopping for your wedding gown. Brides have visions of huge bundles of beautiful flowers surrounded by lace and ivy, cascading down as they walk up the aisle. Beautiful - yes, practical - no. First of all, consider the season you are getting married. You can reduce the cost of your flowers considerably if you choose an arrangement of flowers that are in season. Choose flowers that will last for most of the day. There is nothing worse that looking down at your beautiful bouquet only to see some of the flowers wilting before the ceremony. Consider the size of your bouquet in relation to your size and the style of your wedding gown. For example, you want a bouquet that is going to complement you, not over power you. If you are a petite Bride then consider getting a smaller bouquet, something that will be manageable, because believe it or not as beautiful as these bouquets are, all bunched together, they can be very heavy. We have seen more Brides complain of the weight of their flowers and how they can’t wait to get rid of them. Select flowers that have special meaning to you. For example when my stepdaughter married, her grandmother had nicknamed her – Her Yellow Rose, so as a memory of her grandmother her bouquet had yellow roses in it. Consult with your florist on how they put together the bouquet. Do they tie the full stems all together with a nice ribbon, which is quite popular today or do they cut the flowers and insert them into a Florist Foam placed in a bouquet holder. If this is done, make sure they are secure and won’t fall out. We had one bride whose bouquet started to literally fall apart during the picture taking and at one point she sneezed and the bouquet disintegrated. This is not something you want happen on your wedding day.
If you want a certain flower in your bouquet and it isn’t in season, you would like a large bouquet but don’t want to spend the money, or just don’t have the budget to spend on real flowers consider silk flowers. This is inexpensive, and if you have a good eye, you can make them yourself which will save lots of money. Stores like Michaels have a large selection of silk flowers and usually someone on staff that can help you with your choices. It is amazing what you can do with a little florists tape and ribbon. Search the internet for ideas, there are all kinds of sites that can help you. This could be another area where you set up your Make the Bridal Bouquet Committee. It is a fun way to get your friends together and spend a Saturday night. Silk flowers will also last forever and after the wedding, you can place them in a nice crystal vase to be on display for all to see. By using silk flowers you can also get your bouquets done well in advance before things get too hectic closer to the date. But silk flowers don’t smell. Consider purchasing from a store like the Body Shop or Evelyn & Crabtree a small bottle of fragrant oil and just dab a few drops on your bouquet. You will be amazed of the effect.
Whatever you consider, real or silk or a combination of both, the main thing is you want your flowers to be beautiful. If flowers are an important part of your day, then go ahead and spend the extra money to get something you are satisfied with, if not, then consider options. Just remember, make your decision that is right for you.
DON’T BE CLOSE MINDED WHEN IT COMES TO RECEPTION HALLS
When it comes to reception halls, we tend to think you need to pick Hotels or Conference Centers, or places that are upscale and trendy. There was a time when you wouldn’t dream of having your wedding reception in a Legion Hall or Recreation Center. These places just weren’t posh enough. Thanks to the competition in the wedding industry, these halls have done a turn around and have become ideal for wedding receptions and the best part - you can decorate them yourself. It is amazing what a little bit of rope lighting and crinoline can do. With a little imagination, you can turn a plain old room into something out of a Bridal Magazine. Don’t worry that your guests are going to turn their nose up about the fact they have to walk into a Legion Hall, once inside and the magic of the evening takes hold, they won’t even notice. We had our wedding at an RA Centre and although it is known for being a sports facility, once inside the room, you would never have guessed it. These halls are also a bit cheaper than halls located in a Hotel or Conference Centre.
Another Venue that has become popular today is the All in One. These Venues tend to cater to your whole day. They usually have a room for the Bride and Bridemaids to get ready, a room to hold your ceremony and then a Reception Room for the party. They can also provide a caterer and other services required for your day. They can be very reasonable price wise and worth a look.
Also, when you are shopping around for your reception site, find out if they have special rates. When we booked our room, we found out that if we had more than 60 guests and ordered a three course meal we got the room for free. Seeing as we were also renting a second smaller room for our ceremony, we saved a lot of money. So don’t be afraid to ask questions. Find out what is included in the price. There is nothing worse that thinking you are paying one price but then getting your bill and finding out that you are being charged for all the little extras you thought were included. Decide if some of these extras are really necessary. Chair covers for one – you have to admit look absolutely elegant in a reception hall, but are they really necessary. Unless the chairs are the old metal fold up type, do you really need them? Guests are not going to notice what type of chair they are sitting on. If you want to dress up your chairs but not spend a lot of money, search the internet for options. If you have someone in your family that can sew, ask if they could help you out. Most reception halls have nice upholstered comfy chairs already that don’t need to be covered up. Don’t be afraid to ask your Reception Coordinator what a “dressed up” room looks like. They should all have pictures available for you to browse through. If you find that you want a bit more decoration in your hall, get some friends or family members together who can be part of the “Decorating Committee” and allow them the honor of letting their creative juices flow. You will be amazed how may closet decorators are out there. Any room can be transformed with the right touches.
Decide on the size of the room you want based on the number of guests you will be having. You don’t want your guests to feel they are sitting on top of each other because the room is too small, but on the same note you don’t want them to feel they need to send smoke messages to people across the room in order to have a conversation.
So whatever you choose, make sure it is exactly what you want and won’t break your budget.
DON’T GET CAUGHT UP IN THE PAPER TRAP
We all get excited when we see a wedding invitation. From the time we were little girls we have had the dream of beautiful printed wedding invitations embossed in satin letters, with the little reply card and preprinted envelopes and that little square of tissue paper that keeps things from sticking together. These are beautiful – yes - but can be very expensive. When it comes right down to it, where do they end up after you mail them out? Guests open them up, read them, gush about the fact that little Mary is finally getting married, mail out the reply card, mark the date on their calendar and then throw out your invitation. All that money spent to be recycled in a garbage dump. Once again, if the wedding invitation is important to you, then by all means, spend the money and get what you want. But if it isn’t all that important think about your options. There are endless sights that you can look up to get wording for your invitation or give you creative ideas. If you have someone who is crafty, ask them for help. The possibilities are endless, the money saved amazing. When we got married, we bought some fancy paper from Business Depot, found a nice font in Microsoft Word and printed them ourselves. Instead of having a RSVP card, we offered two choices, an e-mail address or our phone number. Now we only had about sixty people at our wedding so it was easy to even call people if we hadn’t heard from them, but everyone has e-mail nowadays or the capability to use a telephone. Our Wedding invitations cost us probably about thirty dollars total, with envelopes and stamps. We were able to take the money we saved and treat ourselves to an extra nice meal out on our honeymoon. There are also invitation printing programs you can easily download onto your computer that will print invitations. This is another alternative, a bit more expensive that what we did, but definitely not as expensive as going through a Printing Company. So get some ideas together, visit some paper stores, craft stores, ask friends and surf the net. You will be amazed at what you can come up with as a suitable way of letting everyone know you are getting married.
The latest trend in wedding announcements now seems to be the Save the Date Cards. Basically what they say is - Hey – we are getting married next June, haven’t gotten the invitations out yet but make sure you mark that date on the calendar so that when you get the invitation you’ll know. Are they necessary, in my opinion – no but if you like that sort of thing, consider doing them yourself. After all what do they consist of, a piece of card with the wedding information on it stuck to a little magnet so that people can stick them to their fridge. You can buy sheets of magnets at the craft store and make them yourself. Less expensive than going to a printer and having them done and you still get your message across.
DON’T FEEL YOU NEED TO INVITE THE WHOLE TOWN JUST BECAUSE MOM SAID SO
This is another part of wedding planning that can be very stressful. The dreaded guest list. There was a time, when parents paid for the wedding which meant it gave them to right to invite anyone they wanted regardless of what you wanted. Well, things have changed. As I said before, most couples are paying for their own wedding so Mom doesn’t have a say. The most important thing is for you and your future husband to sit down and decide just who you want there, keeping in mind you will have to invite some relatives just to keep Mom happy. You will get suggestions, you will get hints, and you will get all kinds of advice, but stick to your guns. If you don’t want to have Aunt Mavis who you haven’t seen in 20 years to your wedding, don’t invite her just because Mom says so. Set some ground rules with parents as to adding guests to your list. If having your friends and co-workers is important to you, then make sure they get on the list. Of course, this can be a bit more difficult if you come from large families, but the most important thing is make sure you have who YOU want to be there. It isn’t necessary that you have your second cousin twice removed at your wedding but it may be important that you have your co-worker that has always been there for you at work whenever you have need help or advice.
Most important thing, keep your cool and stand your ground. You can get though this
DON’T TRY TO MAKE ALL YOUR FRIENDS PART OF YOUR BRIDAL PARTY
Every Bridal Magazine you look at shows Brides and Groom with an endless line of attendants. The bridesmaids are there to support the bride, comfort her and encourage her before her trip down the aisle. The groomsmen are there to ensure the groom gets a good send off before he enters holy matrimony and do any running around that is required to get ready for the big day. In olden days the duties of the Bridesmaids and Groomsmen was to be there to ward off evil spirits or vengeful suitors. Today, we don’t have to worry about evil spirits or vengeful suitors so it isn’t really necessary to have lots of attendants. If you are popular and have a vast array of close friends, it is really hard to pick your Wedding Party without hurting someone’s feelings. Keep in mind though, that the more bridesmaids and groomsmen you have, the more stress you have added to your day. If you have selected friends from different parts of your upbringing, you are bringing together different personalities and sometimes they clash. We have seen brides get stressed because one of the bridesmaids is acting like a spoiled brat or has gotten into a tiff with one of the other bridesmaids on the eve of the wedding. Not to mention the stress involved in trying to get everyone together for dress fittings, make up and hair the morning of the wedding. All it takes is one person to be late to put the whole day off schedule and upset the bride. One way of avoiding these kinds of situations is to reduce your wedding party. As long as you have a Maid of Honor and a Best man selected who can sign your marriage certificate you should be okay. If you are worried about upsetting friends, then give them tasks to do to make them feel important. There are all kinds of jobs people can do that will make them feel part of your wedding but at the same time reduce the stress. I covered the importance of this briefly at the beginning of the book about organizing Committees. Ushers, Readers, someone responsible for decorating the Church or Hall, someone to make sure the bride’s make up still makes her look radiant, someone to do the running of gathering family members when it is picture taking time, the possibilities are endless. By doing this, you have reduced the stress of the day, and your friends may thank you about not having to pay for a dress that will only be worn once or for the guys – rent a tux. They can still feel part of your wedding and play a very important part and you haven’t ruined any friendships along the way. Just remember come speech time that you give them the thanks they deserve.
DON’T TURN YOUR WEDDING INTO DAYCARE 101
You have to admit, nothing is cuter than a two year old dressed in a fancy dress or tux wearing fancy patent leather shoes with their hair all done up or slicked back. Yes, they are adorable. In the perfect world, these children would all be well behaved and quiet. Well, unfortunately, we don’t live in the perfect world and kids, well, will be kids. If you want that cute little flower girl or ring bearer in your wedding party and don’t mind kids running around at your reception, then by all means, have them, but just keep in mind a few things. You can’t dress up a two year old at 10:00 in the morning and expect them to behave until 4:00. Doesn’t matter how good of a child they are, it isn’t going to happen. We have seen Brides get stressed out because little Susie won’t stop crying and won’t sit still for the photographer or has cried all through the wedding ceremony. Kids are kids and it doesn’t matter how well behaved they are, they all have their moments. Take for example your first dance. This is a very important part of the wedding reception. This is the first time you dance with your husband to a song that has special meaning to you. The first dance should be a memorable and emotional event for both of you. Unfortunately it is rather hard to gaze into your husbands eyes, singing along to that special song, when little Billie is standing on the dance floor doing the twist while your guest all look at him and laugh. I have actually seen this happen. With all of this, I guess what I am trying to say is, think twice before inviting kids to your wedding. Yes, they are cute, but can cause stress to the day. Family members or even friends end up being babysitters for the evening rather than enjoying themselves. If you absolutely want kids included in your wedding then consider hiring a babysitter for the evening and dedicating a room off of the reception room for the kids, having it filled with toys, DVDs, TV, coloring books. That way they will be supervised, amused and parents can enjoy themselves not to mention less stress for the evening.
DON’T USE LIVE ANIMALS FOR YOUR CENTERPIECE
The beautiful centerpiece. The first thing that guest look at when they find their table. They sit and Ohh and Awww and comment and gush and then they usually forget about it shortly after the party starts. Your centerpiece doesn’t have to be fancy. It just has to add that little bit of extra to your décor. Making your centerpieces yourself is a great way to make use of friends who are crafty. You don’t have to get too complicated. A simple vase and candle with a few flowers around it looks beautiful when the lights are dim and the candles are lit. Better yet, if you are having a theme wedding, use your imagination. If it is fall or Halloween, gourds or little pumpkins make a great piece, Spring – have a small vase with some pussy willows surrounded by tea lights, the possibilities are endless. When my stepdaughter got married she was having a medieval theme with all the tables being named after castles. Making the centerpiece was my job and of course wanting something unique and original, I set about making wizards for each table. Each one was different, and I had them surrounded by four tea lights and I must admit, they looked great. Whatever you decide, just make sure you allow enough time to have them made so you won’t be too rushed.
DON’T THINK BIGGER IS BETTER
Okay so you have done everything, flowers are ordered, the dress is bought, everything is arranged expect one last small detail – how do you get to the church on time. Most brides want the big stretch limo for everyone to see. Limos are very nice and make heads turn when they pull up to a church or hall, but what exactly are you paying for? The limo picks you up at your house brings you to the church. He waits for you then takes you and your husband to the park for pictures where he waits for you again. He then takes you and your husband to the reception where he finally says goodnight. You have just paid over $500.00 for a man to wait beside a big fancy car. If you are budget conscious and looking for ways to save, consider an alternative. The cheapest way would be to use someone from the family who is willing to lend you their fancy car for the day, but if you don’t know anyone, think about Rental Agencies. You can rent a nice Sedan for half the price of a limousine, plus you would have it for the whole day or even the weekend instead of just a few hours. Some rental agencies offer specials for weekends at half the cost. What about a driver you say, well, most friends or even an uncle would be more than happy to act as your chauffeur for the day. This is another way to make someone feel like they are part of it. Plus in the evening, you can drive away to your honeymoon location tin cans and all.
DON’T BUY SHOES THAT MAKE YOU LOOK TEN FEET TALL
Next to the wedding dress, the wedding shoes are probably one of items that brides tend to take time selecting. They want something perfect – almost as perfect as the tiny glass slipper that Cinderella wore. Well, glass slippers, although very nice and elegant, aren’t very comfortable. After all, you will be wearing these shoes for a better part of the day. When shopping for shoes look for comfort first, then elegance. Of course you don’t want to be wearing a pair of Doc Martins down the aisle but you don’t have to spend a lot of money on them either. Make sure also that when you find your shoes you wear them in before your wedding day. There is nothing worse than getting ready to walk down the aisle and discovering you have a major blister on your heel can make that walk very difficult when you are in pain. Your care bag can also have a box of heavy duty band aids, just in case. Something brides are doing more and more of is buying an attractive shoe to wear for the ceremony and pictures and then at the reception wearing slippers or sandals. It is a great way to boogie on the dance floor without worrying about sore feet and keep in mind, no one sees your shoes under your dress either.
DON’T TRY TO GET EVERYTHING DONE IN TWO HOURS
You want your wedding day to run smoothly. Many Brides will sit down and plan out a schedule, minute by minute of how the day is going to flow, then get stressed when things don’t run according to their plans. It doesn’t matter how much you plan, someone is going to run late, someone is going to get lost and when this happens it puts the whole schedule off kilter. One of the biggest reasons Brides get off schedule is, believe it or not, their hair and make up appointments. If you are late for that, and late getting back home to get dressed and meet with your Photographer it can put your whole day off, not to mention what it will do to your nerves. If you are having a large wedding party, make sure the Salon you are using will have the staff to accommodate you. If you do have a large bridal party then it takes time to do hair and make up and if the Salon only has one girl then delays are inevitable. Be on time for your appointment, it you are to start at 8:00, be at the salon at 7:45. When doing up your schedule, every step you need to make to get ready for your day, add an extra half hour. If you think you will be at the salon from 8:00 to 10:00, make it 10:30. The same goes for the rest of your day. If you are having speeches at the reception, schedule them sporadically throughout the meal and keep them short. That way by the time dessert is over with, the Bride and Groom can go up, say their thank yous and get the party started. If you have a slide show, try to set it up either directly after the main course or after dessert. The longest part of the whole day will be the Photographs, and you definitely don’t want to skimp on time there. Your Photographer will want to get some great shots of you and your groom on your day and he wants you to be relaxed and at your best, not frazzled and worried because you are running so late and worried about everyone else at the reception. Remember your guests can take care of themselves while they are waiting for you, they are all adults and capable of being left alone for a short period of time. Besides, if any of them do complain about how long you were away, too bad. It is your day and they are your guests. After a great meal, and a fun time on the dance floor, they will quickly forget the time they had to wait.
DON’’T TURN YOUR DAY INTO A RELAY RACE
Everyone has a special spot in a park or an area where you have driven by andsaid to yourself – that is where I want my wedding pictures taken when I get married. The area may be just absolutely beautiful and would make a great background for your wedding pictures making them absolutely breathtaking regardless of the fact the area in question is 50 miles out of town.
Travel time is a big consideration when organizing your wedding day. The bride and her wedding party really don’t have to worry about that because they get driven either my friends or by a limo to their destinations. However, family members and especially the photographer have to drive themselves and sometimes this can be a problem.
Here is a typical (exaggerated) example to explain how this can be an added stress to the wedding based on a the photographers point of view. The photographer shows up at your house to start taking pictures of you getting ready. There is a bit of added stress because you were late getting back from your hair and make-up Now he has to make sure he gets all the pictures you want including a picture of you getting into your limo. Afterwards, he has to drive across town to the church you are having your ceremony at and hopefully, there is no traffic because he needs to get their before you so he can set up. After the ceremony, you will want pictures of outside of the church with your guests and some family pictures as well as the picture of you getting into the limo with your new husband. Now after this he has to drive another hour to a park you have selected for your wedding pictures. Parking is full at this location so he has to find a spot somewhere else as well as the rest of your family members. You are now about 45 minutes behind of your schedule and worried because you have another half hour drive to your reception hall and dinner is being served at 6:00 and it is now 4:30. All these little delays take away from your picture taking especially when you had allotted an hour and a half for pictures and are now down to an hour or less because of travel.
This is a very exaggerated example but these are things to take into consideration. Keep in mind that you can’t always get what you want.
Some venues have beautiful gardens that the wedding pictures can be taken right there but if they don’t and you need to find a location, please keep in mind travel time required and parking requirements for all those involved. You have hired your photographer to capture your day and he/she certainly does not want to disappoint you, but pictures can be affected by distances between venues. Family members can also get frustrated especially when they have out of town guests attending the wedding, they certainly don’t want to spend most of the day in a car traveling from one location to another. They will want to get the family pictures over rather quickly so they can get to their guests.
So, look at your venues and ask yourself these questions:
Are the venues that I have selected a short distance from one another?
Is parking provided free of charge at the park I have selected for pictures?
Will there be ample parking for everyone at the park so no one has to drive around looking for a space?
Have I allowed enough time in between taking travel into consideration?
DON’T FEEL YOU NEED TO GIVE YOUR GUESTS A ROLEX WATCH AS A THANK YOU
The wedding favor dates back to hundreds of years. It is the Bride and Grooms way and saying thank you to their guests for joining in their day. Tradition was that a wedding favor consisted of a slice of wedding cake which if a single woman put under her pillow that evening she would dream about the man she will one day marry. I tried that once and it didn’t work and the only thing I woke up to was a squashed piece of cake under my pillow. Well, as with everything in wedding planning, times have changed. We now offer a much better favor to our guests. This is an area where you can let your imagination run wild and it doesn’t have to cost you a fortune. Candy has always been a favorite to pass out to your guests and if that is your favor of choice consider a Candy Buffet where guests can help themselves with an assortment of sweets. Don’t feel you are limited either. If there is something unique that represents you as a couple, say for example, if you are having a winter wedding, consider giving each of your guests a scarf (thanks to the dollar store, this doesn’t have to be expensive at all), if you both love music, create your own personalized CD with your favorite songs that you guests can listen to for years to come. If you are into gardening, possibly a small burlap bag with some flower bulbs. The possibilities are endless. Don’t be afraid to ask family and friends for ideas and should you decide to make your own favors, this is another area where you can set up your Make the favors Committee. Here are just a few ideas that you could consider:
Don’t forget also that the internet has some great ideas and if you look around you can get some really good deals on unique gifts. Whatever you decide, there is no better way to say thank you than with something from the heart.
DON’T FORGET TO SAY CHEESE
Other than the wonderful memories you will have of your day, you will also get to relive it through the great pictures that you will get back from your photographer. Now some people may say, anyone can take a picture if they have a good camera. Maybe of trees, chickens or beautiful butterflies, but not of the brides’ day. This is one of the areas where it is worth paying a little more to get good quality photography. Cousin Jimmy may offer to shoot your wedding for free with his new fancy digital camera he just got for Xmas but does he know how to work the camera. Most likely yes. Does he know how to pose people, how sun affects pictures, to watch out for what is in the background. There is a 95% chance he doesn’t, so ask yourself – do you take that chance. We have seen friendships ruined by allowing a non-professional take wedding pictures. Now you may ask yourself, just how important is a photographer on the day of your wedding. Well, not only do you want a few nice pictures that you would be proud to show around your home, you also want to be able to look back and have a clear picture of how your day went. One couple we spoke to decided to cut some corners and not hire a photographer but put disposable cameras on all the tables. Those disposable cameras are a fun way to get some wacky shots of your reception but not as a way to get wedding pictures. When they got the pictures back, they were shocked. They did not have one decent picture of themselves. They were left with a whole pile of out of focus pictures none of them album worthy. When starting to shop around for a photographer, decide first just how much you are willing so spend and what style of photography do you prefer. Some Brides really like the photojournalistic style which involves no posed pictures, just the photographer walking around during your wedding day snapping away. Others like the more traditional approach where you have a more posed picture, some like a combination of the two. Whatever you decide, make sure your photographer does the style you want. Don’t hire a photographer who is more into traditional and then send him examples from another photographer and tell him this is what you want. Chances are you won’t get the same effect simply because that is not his style. Before you sign on the dotted line make sure you feel 100% comfortable with the photographer you have chosen. When you think of it, of all the vendors you hire the day of your wedding, the photographer is the only one that is with you for the whole day. It is very important that you like him and that you have faith and trust in him. Provide him with a list of pictures you would like taken that are over and above what he does. Every photographer has a series of poses he takes on a regular basis consisting of bride and groom and families etc., but if there is something else you would like, make sure you let him know. Also, this is where the importance of having friends who want to help out on your wedding day comes in handy. Remember I mentioned earlier how you should appoint a friend to round and gather up family member for photographs – well this is where they go into action. Keep in mind that after the wedding and before the reception – there is probably a two or three hour period where pictures have to be taken. So if there are large families involved, it will take time to get everyone together. Another point to think about when hiring your photographer is make sure he is able or willing to take charge when necessary. If he knows there are only 2 hours before you have to be at your reception in order to get the pictures done as quickly as possible, he will need to take charge of the situation. If he sees you being bombarded by relatives wanting a hug and kiss or if he feels things are moving too slowly, he will step in and get things moving. A lot of times when we have had to do this, the brides thank us for saving them because they feel a bit overwhelmed with all the people around them but don’t want to be rude to their guest. It is also important to give your Photographer a clear schedule of your day so he will know where to be or what is going on at all times. A cell phone number is also very handy in case he needs to contact you for some reason. Remember Photographers cars break down too. Another mistake Brides make is they see a posed picture in the wedding magazines and will tell the Photographer – I want this pose and then they are disappointed when they see the shot and they don’t like it or they don’t look as good a the girl in the picture. Keep in mind, the girl in that photo is a paid model, with perfect skin and perfect teeth, the lighting in the studio is just right, and the Photoshop feature on the computer where the photograph is edited works really well at removing all kinds of things or adding things that aren’t there. A Photographer can only attempt to recreate a pose he cannot guarantee how it will turn out.
So a few things to keep in mind when shopping around for a Photographer:
1 Make sure you like his style of photography
2 Does his personality match yours, does he have a good sense of humor and will he mix with your family
3 Does he make you feel comfortable and at ease
4 Do you feel confident in his abilities and do you trust him to take your pictures
5 Decide what is important to you when it comes to wedding pictures
A few things to remember after you booked your Photographer
1 Make sure you have given him an up to date schedule of your day and he can reach you in case of an emergency.
2 Assign a friend to be the family gatherer for the day so your Photographer doesn’t have to guess who Aunt Mary is or wonder where she is
3 Find out from him alternative places for pictures should the weather not cooperate – in other words – have a plan B.
4 Don’t be afraid to ask questions, that is what he is there for. If you have any concerns about what his role will be or what will be expected of you, ask - that is what he is there for.
5 When you decide where you would like to have your pictures taken, consult with him – he may have suggestions, ideas or problems with the location you selected.
Just remember, a good relationship with your Photographer means less stress the day of your wedding and less stress means a happier Bride and a happier bride means wonderful wedding pictures full of happy smiles.
DON’T FORGET VENDORS NEED TO EAT
This has got to be one of the most confusing questions Bride’s ask when they start planning their wedding. Do I need to feed my vendors – after all, I am paying them? The answer – YES, if they are attending your reception. The most important is your photographer and videographer. They will be with you the entire day so by the time meal time comes around, they are hungry and they are entitled to a meal break whether it be at your reception or down the street at the local restaurant. You wouldn’t work a full day without needing a break or a meal so you can’t expect them to work 6 or more hours and not have them get hungry. So whatever you decide here are a few things to consider:
- If you want events captured during your meal, such as speeches, feed your photographer. He can’t capture these moments if he is down the street at the local McDonalds.
- If you are seating your photographer and videographer at a table with some of your guests, serve them the same meals as everyone else. It would look a bit cheap if you are serving roast beef to your guests but your photographer and videographer are only getting a club sandwich with fries.
- If you are having your DJ play dinner music during the meal then it is only natural you will offer him a meal. Keep in mind, although he hasn’t been with you for most of the day, he will be there during meal time and will be there until after midnight. Usually the DJ will eat at his table where his equipment is set up, but just in case, ask him what he would prefer.
- if your DJ is only there after dinner, then you are not entitled to offer him a meal, but should you have a buffet later on in the evening, you should let him know that he is welcome to help himself.
- your videographer will usually have a camera set up on a tri pod pointed toward the head table to capture those special moments, but your photographer relies on what he sees to determine whether a picture needs to be taken. Make sure you seat your photographer at a table where he has a view of the head table, can get up and move around with ease in order to get the picture.
Keep in mind; although you are paying your vendors to work at your wedding, they are human. They do get hungry and thirsty and are entitled to take the odd break to rest and if your vendors are happy, then if makes for a more enjoyable day and lots of great memories to look back on.
DON’T FORGET TO PLAY MUSICAL CHAIRS
So all the plans are pretty much finished, the hall is booked, caterer hired, meal decided, dress is bought and hanging in the closet at your Mother’s house, everything is falling into place. Now you have to face one of the other stressful times in wedding planning. The dreaded seating arrangement chart. Oh yes, this can have Brides pulling their hair out for sure and can cause your own mini world war three. You will hear complaints, you will get all kinds of suggestions, and you will get arguments and protests and endless criticisms no matter what you do. But it doesn’t have to be like that by remembering one simple rule – You can’t make everyone happy so don’t try. Your wedding, your seating chart, plan and simple. If they don’t like where they are sitting then too darn bad. We were at one wedding where an uncle was making such a fuss because he didn’t like the table he was sitting at. The bride was very upset and the groom was trying to find ways to make the uncle happy and stop him from complaining, which wasn’t working. Finally, the groom just told him, this is where you are sitting if you don’t like it then you can leave. He left. Hopefully that won’t happen to you, but you will have complaints. Stand your ground and be firm. The best thing to do is make lists of your guests according to rank. The wedding party is easy because they all sit at the head table, but you will have family to deal with. Keep in mind that most tables will sit 8 people maybe nine with out too much trouble, but don’t fit in anymore than that. Parents and grandparents would take priority, then sisters or brothers and their spouses, then after that you do the Aunts and Uncles, then move onto friends and co-workers and then vendors. Do the same for the Grooms side and you should be able to seat people with ease. When I did my table settings I made a list starting with Parents, Brothers and Sisters, co-workers and then friends, and I just counted down the list blocking off every eight as a table. After I finished I just had a bit of re-organizing to do and voila – it was done. Now if you are having a bigger wedding, it can get a bit more complicated but not impossible. Remember that people sit together for a very short period of time and then they get up and start mingling again. It isn’t going to kill them to sit at a table with someone they don’t know, besides what a great way to make new acquaintances and tell people stories that have never heard them before. If you are feeding your Photographer and Videographer, you can sit them at a table with your guests if you have the extra room. If not, ask the Co-coordinator to set up a table off to the side for them. This usually works best because they will be getting up periodically during the meal to take pictures and check video cameras and won’t be disturbing your guests.
DON’T FORGET THE MUSIC
It is your wedding day. The day has gone by without any problems what so ever. Your guests are happy and as you walk around the reception room you notice that no one is up dancing. You ponder about this and ask one of your friends why. You get an answer you didn’t expect. “The music sucks”. Now is not the time to realize that maybe you should have put a bit more research in finding a DJ. The music of the evening can either make or break your reception. We have seen weddings were DJs have shown up dressed in torn jeans and muscle shirts and spent the night with a cigarette hanging out of their mouth or we have seen DJs who have not that much experience and just spend the night sitting behind their equipment with no idea how to get the party going. A good, experienced DJ will be able to read the group. He will, in a sense, take charge and even act as your Emcee for the rest of the evening. He will know what to do to get people up dancing. When we got married we sat down with our DJ and told him what we wanted and didn’t want. We didn’t need bubble machines and foggers. We just wanted a DJ who was going to do what he does best – play music. We wanted him to play songs that would guarantee people up on the dance floor. From the moment our first dance was finished to the end of the evening, everyone was up dancing. It was a great night. So, this may be an area where you may want to pay a bit more money. Decide what you want and what you expect out of your DJ. If the little extras like bubbles and fog are important to you then by all means have them. Don’t be afraid to bargain with your DJ. Let him know just what you expect from him. One thing we found out when shopping around for a DJ that saved us some money was dinner music. How many weddings have you been to where you can remember music playing during the meal. The point is you usually don’t notice because you are too busy eating or talking to your table mates. The DJ we selected charged an extra hundred dollars to set up and play music while we ate. We discovered that the hall we booked had free of charge had piped in dinner music available. So right there we saved money. We wanted someone who would play music, not play little games that some DJs do plus we offered to pay him cash. Right there we saved some more money as they tend to reduce the price a bit for cash. Make sure you provide your DJ with a schedule of your evening. It is important for him to know when you plan on doing your first dance, throwing of the bouquet and garter. He can’t do his job if he doesn’t know what it is. A good DJ will ask the right questions, take an interest in your day as if it was his own, take charge if needed, will dress professionally and make sure everyone is having a good time. We have seen DJs who go over and above the call of duty like making sure the Bride and Grooms needs are met, bringing them little snacks during picture taking if the pictures are taken at the reception hall and basically bending over backwards to ensure the evening is a success. So, decide first how important the music is to your wedding and plan it from there. Chances are you will realize that in order to get good service, this is one of the areas you do need to spend a bit more.
DON’T THINK EVERYTHING WILL BE PERFECT
No matter how careful you plan your day, something is bound to go wrong at some point. It could be as simple as a button popping off, to a hem being ripped but what ever it is - be prepared. We have seen Brides agonize over the fact that the flowers weren’t set in the proper place at the church. Why -- because they want their wedding to be perfect. Chances are your guests won’t notice. Brides and Grooms worry more about the big stuff and don’t think of the little stuff. So here are a few words of wisdom to make sure the unexpected doesn’t happen. Every bride should pack an Emergency kit. It doesn’t have to be carried around the whole day, it can be left in someone’s car but it should be within easy reach should it be needed. Some of the things you need to put in it would be: hand lotion, wet wipes, Tide Pen, curling iron, tissues, brush, hairspray, bobby pins, nail polish that you are wearing that day, nail polish remover, toothbrush and toothpaste, tweezers, baby powder, deodorant, small grooming kit, small sewing kit, band aids, safety pins, Advil, upset stomach remedy, breath mints, bottled water and anything else you feel you may need. Hopefully you won’t need any of it but you never know. If you don’t use any of it, then you have a fully stocked medicine cabinet in your house when you come back from your honeymoon. Most importantly, keep your cool should a situation pop up. I have seen Brides reduced to tears because their hair flopped during the day, or they discover that the groom ripped his pants when he was attempted the limbo. Instead of crying about it turn it around and make it a funny story that everyone will be telling for years to come. Imagine bumping into one of your guests five years down the road and they say – Oh yes, I remember your wedding, that was where John split his pants and after you stopped laughing, had to go and get them sewed up. Rather than people saying, I remember that wedding - John ripped his pants trying to do the limbo and his bride got so mad at him because she felt he had done it on purpose and her day was ruined. Well, that may not really happen, but you get the picture.
What do you do if the little things go wrong? Well, always have a back up plan. You get to your reception and realize you forgot your throw away bouquet at home – what do you do. Don’t stress about it, take a few flowers from your bouquet, a few from your bridesmaids bouquets and tie them together – Voila, instant throw away. Forgot your garter for the garter throw – speak to the DJ, chances are he will have a game up his sleeves that you can play that will have the same effect.
DON’T THINK YOU NEED TO HAVE SOMEONE TELL YOU WHAT TO DO
When it comes to planning your wedding, it is only natural that you want everything to go smoothly and with all of your other responsibilities be it full time jobs, school, working towards a degree, or various other things that take up your time, most brides have no idea what or where to start so they turn to the only logical answer - the Wedding Planner. We have worked with a few Planners along the way and they are great. They are a real stress reliever if your schedule is so busy you can’t afford any time to organize your day. Are they really necessary, that is up to you to decide, but if you follow the guidelines of this book, allow yourself lots of time, and plan things carefully, you don’t really need one not to mention the fact that a good wedding planner can be expensive and when you are on a limited budget, this can be a deciding factor. All the vendors you will use have extensive experience organizing weddings and even your reception venue will have a planner dedicated to your day. You might even find one of your friends is a Wedding Planner Want to Be. This would be the perfect time to let them shine. Now I stress, there is absolutely nothing wrong with hiring a wedding planner if that is what you want, but wouldn’t you rather put the money towards something that is more important. One of the things that makes your wedding memorable is all the planning, the running around, the meetings with vendors, the evenings you and your future husband sat down and decided which vendor to use. Keep in mind that there are different types of Planners. There are the Planners that do it all, from booking the Church to telling you when to walk down the aisle, then there are the ones that just show up for your day and make sure that flowers arrive on time or the cake shows up at the reception and there. So if you are a busy bride with not a lot of time on her hands, then by all means, hire a Planner to help you. Not only will they organize your day but will help you stay within your budget, but if you have the time and like to get involved and would like to save a bit of money, then by following some of the information in this book, you can plan your wedding yourself and keep your stress level to a minimum. Either way, the day will be great.
DON’T FORGET TO SAY HI TO EVERYONE
Of all the traditions that come with weddings, the one that most Brides’ feel they can’t do without and the one that takes up a lot of time is the receiving line. Yes it is important to thank everyone for coming and to say hi to relatives you haven’t seen in years but do you need to do so in a line up. Traditional receiving lines included the Bride and Groom, Mothers and Fathers and the whole wedding party. If you have a small wedding and a small wedding party, this won’t cause any problems with your schedule. But if you have a large wedding and a large wedding party, you could find yourself falling behind in your timeline. For a typical receiving line, it can add at least 20 minutes to your schedule and when you think about the fact that after the ceremony you go straight for pictures which can take anywhere from an hour and a half to two hours to your reception, if you have to take up 20 minutes or so this can delay dinner. For example, you wedding is at 3:00 to 4:00. Afterwards you go for your pictures so you have to add in travel time depending on locations and it takes at least an hour and half to get all your pictures done, providing everyone cooperates. Pictures will be done at 6:00 or so and your dinner is set to start at 6:30 – doesn’t give you a lot of time for a receiving line. There is nothing worse than having to rush through the line up because the Caterers are ready to start serving the salad and no one is sitting yet. How do you avoid this added stress? Simple, don’t have a receiving line. I am not saying you don’t acknowledge your guests, you still do, just do it in an easier, less stressful manner. Instead of having a receiving line that includes everyone, just have you and your new husband. After all, who do people want to see and hug and congratulate – the Bride and Groom, not a Bridesmaid that no one really knows? As the guests enter the reception hall, have you and your groom greet them, possibly stand by the seating chart and direct your guests as to where they are to sit. This way you say hi to everyone and the rest of the evening can flow with ease. Another option, if you have a small wedding, after the meal, you and your groom go around, table to table, thank everyone and hand out whatever favor you are giving your guests – this makes for a nice personal touch and you get to see everyone. Some Bride and Grooms have greeted their guest by table. After the guests are seated, the Bride and Groom are introduced and as they enter, they go to each table before reaching the head table. This could be done as the salad is being served. Keep in mind that through out the evening you will have long lost relatives and friends hugging and kissing you so you could use that time to say hello.
If you really insist on the traditional receiving line, there is nothing wrong with that. Just be aware of the fact that when you are scheduling your day, include that 20 or so minutes it will take to get everyone through. 20 minutes may not seem like a lot, but when you are on a schedule and want to get the party started at a reasonable time – 20 minutes can seem like an eternity.
DON’T FORGET SECOND TIME AROUND COUNTS TOO
The world is not perfect and sometimes things don’t turn out the way we expected. This happens to the best of us. It happened to us. We both were married once before, had the big white traditional weddings with the hundreds of guests we never saw again and after many years realized that our dream was over and it was time to move on. We did and we found each other. Being much older we both knew what we wanted and what we didn’t want. We set a very realistic budget and started planning. Getting married the second time is quite different that the first time. You are older, wiser and have a better understanding as to what is important. We wanted a day that was unique, a day that was all about us. We invited people we wanted, wrote our own ceremony, limited speeches, made sure we picked a place where the food was excellent, and set about to have a wonderful party. Pretty much the same kind of things you would find for someone planning their first wedding but without all the frills and lace. It has been four years now and people are still talking about how our wedding was the best wedding they had ever been to. Why you ask. Well, because it was about us, it was about love and it was about enjoying life. It wasn’t about having the biggest limousine, or the largest wedding cake. In fact, our wedding cake was a simple slab cake similar to a birthday cake but decorated with the Toronto Maple Leaf logo, my husbands favorite team. We had only people there we wanted, people we worked with, a very select few of close family members, our children and some close friends and neighbors. We did away with a lot of the traditions and planned the day for us. You realize that all the fuss is not necessary in order to have a wonderful wedding. As we get older we tend to not have such a vast list of friends, mostly because as life goes on people move away or get caught up in their own lives and lose touch. We figured, why would we want to invite someone to our wedding who we haven’t seen in 20 years and probably won’t see again afterwards. It was a wonderful day and stress free. I didn’t worry that someone would put the cake on the wrong table or that the guest book wasn’t in the right place. Those are things that just weren’t important to me. They can be moved. What was important to us was that our guests had a great time, that the food was good and that the music would keep everyone up dancing for the whole night.
DON’T FORGET TO BREATH
So there you have it. All the little tips of the trade that will help you plan your wedding. Remember, and I can’t stress this enough, if you DO WANT all the trimmings, the big limos, the five tiered wedding cakes, the orchestras, then have them. It is your day after all. The whole purpose of this book is to help you in planning your wedding if you are on a tight budget by giving you some things to think about and maybe help you save some money if those things aren’t that important to you. It will help you put your money where it will be best spent. Weddings today cost a lot more than they did twenty years ago and why do you want to start off your married life together with a huge debt. There is nothing wrong with spending and planning wisely. So some of the things to remember are:
1. Think about what guests will and will not notice at a wedding;
2. The most important areas where a bit more money should be spent is Photography, DJ and Food;
3. Decide just how important things like limos are to your day;
4. Don’t over schedule our day and add an extra half hour to every activity;
5. Find out from your Reception Hall how your tables will be set – you may not need a fancy centerpiece;
5. Don’t be afraid to delegate;
6. Most importantly, have fun together, the day is all about you – enjoy it.
In a year, when you are celebrating your first wedding anniversary, you can reminisce about your wedding day with wonderful memories and funny stories as you gaze through your wedding album knowing that you put on one heck of a party that people will be talking about for years.
Remember, it is a day about love, romance and two people coming together to share their lives, fulfill their hopes and reach their dreams together.
Good Luck and Happy Planning.