J.N. Jones
I really enjoyed what you have written so far! There are a couple of places where it feels a bit wordy and there's a typo here and there. All in all a wonderful little world you're building; I like it!
Nick Szafranski
This reads very well, good job and I can't wait for the rest.
A. White
Clash with the immortals. Temple to the Moksha has a very interesting plot