Prologue: Thor, God of Housekeeping

"Hi, this is room 218. Can I get a few extra pillows sent up?"

"Why? Were the pillows missing?"

"What? No. I'd just like a few more."

"There're four on a bed, and it looks like you have two beds."


"That's eight pillows."


"So you're alone. I saw you come in. Alone."

"What the hell does that matter? You guys rationing out your pillows or something?"

"I'm just saying that eight pillows is a lot of pillows. Especially for one person."

"I've got a sleeping disorder, all right? It's better for me if I sleep upright."

"There is an armchair in every room."

"Are you being serious right now?"

"Yes. It's the thing that looks like an armchair."

"Don't get smart with me."

"You're making that really difficult."

"Look, you son of a bitch, send up the pillows or I'm talking to your manager and getting your ass fired."

"Fine." Thor Odinson, former Norse God of Thunder, hung up the phone violently and looked around the hotel lobby. "Where's Paulo?"

"On break," replied his co-worker, Catrina Dalisay, without looking up from the magazine she was reading on her tablet.

"He just took a break."

"Well, now he took another one."

"That doesn't seem right."

"Just bring the pillows up yourself."

"It's demeaning."

"It's your job."

"It's Paulo's job."

"And it's your job to do his job when he doesn't."

"How does that work?"

"Just fucking do it, Thor."

"This is bullshit," snarled the former thunder god as he walked out from behind the front desk of the Holiday Inn.


Thor opened the door to the second floor linen closet and sighed. He grabbed three pillows into his thick arms and started down the hallway, stopping in front of room 218. He sighed again. Hard.

The Norseman raised his hand to knock on the door, but thought better of it. Well, not really "better."

Thor let two of the pillows fall to the ground and pulled open the pillowcase on the third. He held it up to his ass and farted mightily through his khakis, pulling the pillowcase closed again as quickly as he could. He rolled up the end tightly and repeated the ritual for the other two pillows.

Then Thor knocked on the door.

"Your pillows, sir."

Next Chapter: Everyone Died Violently